Friday, December 29, 2006

Blogger's block

so i've hit the inevitable blogger's block. with nothing interesting to write about, coupled with the immense decrease of interest in taking photos and camwhoring, so to speak, i don't seem to have stuff to talk about anymore.

which is odd because i've been out and about almost every day watching the cash in my wallet deplete with every transaction. but that's the thing, i go out, i have fun, but it's nothing more interesting than what-i-had-for-breakfast tales.

so let's see. what's up with me? i'm still running. almost every morning. with my brother around i'm miraculously able to push myself over the limits by clocking times i don't think i have done before. hopefully, by the time the GE 30 km comes running that sorta distance would be a breeze...

Oh! and i'm totally hooked on Prison Break. That show? Is genius! it took me a while to warm up to Mr Micheal Scofield, but that was coz i was still lingering on the thought of Lucas and Nathan Scott, which, for some unknown reason have stopped coming out. But now that i've gone deep deep into his amazing blue eyes...yes, i'm 100% hooked. and everytime someone does something to someone (like burn, punch, cut of body parts!!!) i cringe and gasp and cover my eyes. it's almost disturbing. ALMOST. but not enough to repel me. seriously. I got it bad.

what else? that's about it i guess. I'm leaving for my hometown in Pahang today with the family. I'll be back on Sunday itself, to usher in 2007. I don't know what my plans are yet, so if you've got any, let me know aight? :)

Monday, December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas!

another year another Christmas
but what have i learned thus far?
perhaps i've grown a little stronger inside
a little less tendency to run and hide
from those who'd left a scar

another year another Christmas

how much more have i gained?
perhaps i've grown to love a little more
and hate a little less for sure
friends whom ties with me are strained

another year another Christmas
how does this year differ from last?
perhaps i've grown to talk a little less
and try to listen at my very best
to those who share tales of their past

another year another Christmas
another year older and wiser
perhaps there is more that i yearn
much more that i intend to learn till
another Christmas another year....

Here's wishing all my dear readers a Blessed Christmas, and a fruitful New Year for everyone to grow a little stronger, love a little more, listen a little more, and yearn to learn even more...:)

Friday, December 22, 2006

chong ar!!!!!

paintball rocks! :)

and the running begins... daily morning runs with brother dearest have begun. at 7 am the past 2 mornings, i have been sweetly woken up by Anna Nalick's Breathe, thanks to the oh-so-fabulous hand-me-down 3G-mp3-walkman-watchamacallit handphone my brother gave me. and for the past 2 mornings, ive been feeling pretty good. :) so i hope to continue this routine of mine and hopefully by January, i'll be ready for the Great Eastern 30km run. Yes, a guy called Meng whom i met at the NCS run somehow drove me to participating in a 30 km run. so...bring it on....:)


i met up with Jerry and Terry and Iiko (yes i know...interesting names, interesting people) in 1 Utama today. Jerry came from Singapore, so i decided to bring them to Chilli's for lunch. More because i was craving a good western meal. But a good, delicious western meal cost me a lot of money today. but owell, it's a sunk cost now. i had a good time, i enjoyed my meal. :)

the funny thing was, as i fetched Iiko out from ss2, i received a call from Chiat, strangely. who would've guessed that my funky white sunnies can be recognized even when i'm driving the new Myvi. hehe...:)

oh! and we tried out the batting cage in 1U!! it's so fun! and not that pricey too! ha...i could get used to cheap physical fun. :)

i'll wait for Iiko to send me the pics...:)


today we met our external director for our Grease Musical Production next year. It's gonna be so much fun! now why wasn't i blessed with a singing voice??? you know what they always say about singers? everyone loves a crooner. you can be ugly as hell, have a stinkin attitude, and yet people love you the moment you open your mouth to sing. you dont see people getting too thrilled when a little miss runner comes around. haha...

well anyway, i hope i actually get to be IN the play, and not in the stage crew...actually i wanna be Rizzo! haha...


the G5 class of 2004 gathered at my humble abode today. some of which i have not seen in 2 years. it's amazing how time really flies. but it's always good to see old friends again. i especially loved the christmas present/souvenir/2 years of missed birthday presents which Kevin gave to me. i still cant believe he gave me a hydra pack!

Kevin Hui if you're reading this, thanks again! i really really love it!

well, another gathering, another's not so painful to leave some of these guys, coz i know i'll see them again soon. but for the rest, i guess there's just no telling when we'll ever meet again! I miss them already.'s not like we were really tight, but it's just the mere thought of probably having to wait for another 2 years that kinda dampens my spirits.

anyway, i didnt really have time to take pictures. so here's a group pic. :)

Sunday, December 17, 2006

NCS Charity Run

yup, it seemed only right that with my brother back from Perth, the entire family would once again march onto the battle field as one where runners combat in an endurance feat to find a victor amongst the rest.

Well, actually...i just needed my running fix as i've laid off running for a long long time. thanks to the sprained ankle, and the ever so hectic schedule of OYP/ACC 6 devoid of PT (physical training) time, and the immense post OB behaviour which consists largely of long bumming periods and even longer sleeping periods.

but i've pulled through. So at 6.30 am, the entire Siah family was found in Kiara Park in TTDI, stretching, lunging, chatting, warming up and bracing ourselves for the treacherous uphills and slopes of the Kiara Park route. 7 am, the veterans were flagged off. this consists of runners aged 40 and above. 7.05 am, the adults were flagged off, aged 22 and above. and finally at 7.10 am, the young adults, consisting of those aged 12 to 21 were flagged off.

My younger brother and i were in the same age category, which was a me. because that meant we flagged off at the same time. and try as i might, i wasn't able to keep up with the young lad, even when if i pride myself to be OB trained to tackle those hills. however, the poor guy has a handful of African/Kenyan runners to compete with. it was hard keeping a steady pace when i have had zero training since the Powerman. nonetheless, i persevered.

slowly but surely i overtook girls who were in my category. Adele was somewhere along the way snapping pictures. finally as i veered out of the park and into the finishing line, i was quite shocked to learn that i have emerged First! my first reaction was ecstasy of course. but when Uncle Stan's little girl came up to me saying "woh hen sin tong! woh nah di si ming!" (I'm so disappointed, i got 4th place!) my heart went out to her. then Keith came up to me and said he came in about 3 minutes before me, and got 15th place. now i feel like a big bully. depriving little kids of prizes they deserve for their efforts.

i promise i shall share every single box of cornflakes in that hamper with Keith.

in a nutshell, it was a good run. :) i feel a tad healthier now.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

all i want for Christmas

all i want for Christmas is a BD harness, a belay set, a pair of Saltic shoes and a nice BD chalk bag. oh and a Deuter haversack would be great too...yea...oh wait, also a brand spanking new Lerun mountain bike...yea...i think thats about it.

not too much to ask right??? :)

Thursday, December 14, 2006

if you knew

if you knew
that every time i saw your car
parked inside your front porch
a flicker of hope rises in me
lighting me up like a torch

if you knew
that every time you fail to show
i feel my heart sink a little deeper
that every time you can't make it
i feel my hopes grow a little thinner

if you knew
that every time that i'm alone
i wonder what you were doing
and whether or not i was ever
apart of your daily pondering

if you knew
that very often i wonder
if you've ever looked back
or whether or not i am
completely taken off your tracks

if you knew
all that i wish for now
all that i wish to see
all that i wish to happen
what would u say to me?

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

this just in!

okay something else which tops the powerbar team elite news.

My results are in! and i have to say i'm pretty darn proud of myself. :)

that's 2 Distinctions and 2 Credits. so...yay me! :)

Hello, Karen please?

I was gonna write OB novel when another incident occured which for me now has priority over any other issue...

I got a phonecall today from...get this...Powerbar Malaysia!! I'm going for an interview tomorrow for Powerbar Team Elite!!!!! I'm so psyched about it that i'm a nervous wreck! i don't know how i'm going to appear as deserving as the hundreds of other far better athletes who applied. i mean, what am i going to say to them? Hey, I'm Karen. I got last for the recent Powerman Lumut. and IF i get in, i have this fear that i may not be performing up to par. scareddddddd......


ok. now for the OB story.

It was always exciting to anticipate my going back to OB. every year i look forward to it like a HUGE early Christmas present. This year was no exception. I was counting down the days to OB and when the day i left for Lumut finally came, i was the happiest soul ever.

Alongside Mel and Eugene we stepped into the grounds of sweet Mother Nature and was instantly reminded of all the great fun and crazy moments we had in the previous years. meeting the new CAs and several new instructors was a treat. However, much to my dismay (and Mel's) Project Trust has once again sent female participants.

Lucky for us, SIA course was running at the same time. So in those brief moments in which our paths coincided with the SIA pilots, we were granted short ogling periods. Or at least i was. Mel claims there was none that qualified as eye candy.

I kick started OYP/ACC 6 (which is the name of the course) with a bang! On the day prior to the start of course, i had to steal everyone's limelight (except Rameash's) by spraining my right ankle playing football. The silly thing was, i wasn't even kicking any balls. I was doing a throw in. yes you got that right. legs were stationary, ball was in hands, and yet i was somehow able to trip over and land precariously on my right ankle. see, i wasn't kidding when i said time and time again, that i've got absolutely no ball sense. :)

as much as my pride would not allow it, tears streamed down my face not out of pain but out of sheer disappointment (i now understand how my brother must've felt when he sprained his ankle before his race). last year's OBS had me quarantined on the first couple of days because of the conjunctivitis scare. knowing that history was repeating itself made me ever so frustrated with myself....lucky for me, i was only partially disabled for 1 and a half days. and because a sprained ankle was not contagious, i was allowed to go down and meet my participants as long as the activities they did required minimal movement.

my participants were a friendly lot. various characters and personalities. i was totally awed by the girls of Cedar Girls School. I was tickled by our local boys. I had fun. One hundred percent fun. My instructor, Azirin, was just amazing! I enjoyed every day being her CA. Including the somewhat special duties that she had me in charge of. Not like im complaining *wink*. I'd willingly watch over muscle bound, tanned high school teachers, free lance personal trainers and part time models anytime. :) And Amin, my partner in crime, Azirin's other CA...i swear i laughed so hard my sides now ache permanently. the guy has this animated face and an insane sense of humour!

this was the first time i was having my period during OBS so that, too, was an experience. Trying to balance on a sprained ankle behind moderately tall bushes to take a piss and change the pad is an act every girl should master. I reckon, if you can do that, you can do anything. haha...

and the new CAs i befriended were awesome. They know just how to make a 20 year old feel old. Xiang, Mel and Amin just made Group 2 simply explosive! haha...the new instructors are way cool. Ijan was this guy who helped me with my ankle when i sprained it. Lifu is such an angel, that we all bullied him like mad. and the others were just people i'd never regret meeting.

even the little chickadees of the Children's course had touched our lives in one way or another. you cannot believe how maju little 10 and 11 year olds are these days. And how sweet and adorable they can be, even in their smelliest dirtiest attire.

The last day, bore lots and lots of tears as the Singaporeans went up their buses and left us all with heavy hearts. I felt this pang of sadness too when Mel and Eugene were taking their last pictures of everything. I wish they would change their minds and go with me again to OB.

It's true what they say. You can never really leave Outward Bound. Once u step into it for the first time, whether or not you hated it at first, you're bound to leave with the intention to come back again. signing off, i'll leave you with this...

Group 2 yeng...Group 2 keng...Group 2 CAs mou tak teng!!!!
-Melanie Ho, 2006

Monday, November 27, 2006

Who will join us now at Outward Bound?

Last year, Instructor Karen asked me:

"Karen, do you have a boyfriend?"
"Are you looking for one?"
"What? No!"

Reason being she didnt want me to go flirting and frolicking around with a bunch of 15-17 year olds. Not like I would. I wouldn't even date a guy who's a year younger than I.

This year, however, if she were to ask me the same question i think the incident would turn out like this:

"So, Karen, do you have a boyfriend now?"
*giggles* "Still no?" *sniggers* "So are you looking for one?"
"No...of course not"
*laughs* "Maybe it's time you should..."

Do you reckon i should lie to save my pride? *shrugs* Well, in an hour's time, i'll be going to Mel's house in Kajang. Tomorrow i'll be leaving for OBS Lumut! See you guys in 14 days time with loads and loads of pictures!

Saturday, November 25, 2006

i dont want to just settle for you

i see you...
as someone that i can talk to
someone who shares the fun
to smile with and laugh with
and reminisce through things we've done

i see you...
as someone who looks out for me
who makes sure i'm home safe and sound
who treats me with pride and generosity
as someone i'd feel safe around

yet when i need a shoulder to cry on
a hug to say that things are okay
when i need someone who understands
who knows without having me to say

when i think of someone who'd back me up
who'd give me faith when i have fallen
whose hands are there to pull me up
and tell me just how far i have gotten

when i see the person who knows me through
who sometimes know me more than i do
who'd say the right words and do the right things
try as i might, i can't seem to picture you

and that is what hurts me the most
for never again would i want to go through
the path i took that point in time
never again do i want to just settle for you...

i told Ju that i think i have the tendency to cheat next time. because i'm a stubborn mule who refuses to accept and move on. i sing, everyday, Hinder's Lips of an Angel with such emotion that i could've fooled people into believing that i wrote it. it's silly, i know. i tell myself, if you don't want to cheat then don't! simple and logical, innit? it is everything but. and i'm not liking myself very much for it. so yea...self bashing mechanism initiated. readers, be warned.


on a brighter note, i got my hair highlighted today from The Academy for RM30. and i'm pretty happy with the results :)

Thursday, November 23, 2006


i've become one of those youngsters who requires an alarm clock to wake up at 11 am.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

goodbye Milo tees

I'm parting with my Milo T-Shirts.

My t-shirt drawer is about to explode and the new tees aren't gonna stop coming in. I once said i wasn't going to give them away no matter what i do, because they each represent a part of my life for which i would never trade for the world. But there's no room left and unfortunately free tees that come with race kits now are branded and made from dri-fit material. so between high quality dri-fit branded t-shirts, and cotton oversized white Milo t-shirts, however do i pick?



heck, i dont know why i even ask...:)


there are several things one should not be addicted to.

One Tree Hill season 4 is one of them.

for the simple reason that having to wait for subsequent episodes to come out is edging on unbearable.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

the end...:)

And it was with that final stab, that she took down the last of Exams. With black ink so bold, she scathed the face of Huma Resource Management 200, the last of the dark warriors, without so much as a flinch from her gaze. Smiling, she knew she had earned what she had yearned for...she was free...

haha...yes drama queen i may be, but it doesnt change the fact that i am over and done with exams. HRM was alright. I supposed when i can write till i ran out of ink, it's always a good sign. Now to kick off those heels and let the hair down...metaphorically speaking of course, since i neither wear heels to college nor do i own hair that is long enough to be "let down", so to speak.

and so, what did a bunch of raving hooligans do to commemorate the final day of their imprisonment? we scooted over to Sunway Pyramid, whereby a heated debate between the girls and the guys started. You see, the women were in need of cute cuddly penguins to relax whereas the boys needed some bloody action with hot women to keep them on their toes, considering the accumulated amount of sleep that they had could not reach 6 hours. with much negotiation, the girls relented and gave in to the cravings of men, God forbid they'd do that the rest of their lives.

and so, i hereby comment that with all the hoo-ha and publicity and ravings about Double-0-7 in Casino Royale? i've only decreased my already low impression of James Bond in general. The script has gotten much cornier, the Bond girl was a far cry from elegant and gorgeous, and sad to say, i'd pull a trigger on the idiot who casted Daniel Craig. First of all, far too many beautiful cars got demolished in the movie in a very very shameful manner. Second, James Bond is a lot more ruthless and not so much the gentleman we all were taught to think he is. and finally, the plot is senseless.

it was disappointing and a total waste of my RM8.

dinner was with the same group at a Bak Kut Teh shop in Klang. And then we adjourned to some Swenson/A Bread Story like place in Bukit Tinggi called Leo for a couple hours of stitch inducing laughs. :)

Sunday, November 19, 2006

tossing and turning

alone in my room wrapped in silence
tossing and turning in the still night

squeezing my eyes in persistence

with all focus to shut out the light

louder and louder i hear the clock tick

faster and faster the cars seem to travel

my eyes dart around at every tap, every click

my ears hear sounds that was never audible

images of happenings throughout the day

words and words on white sheets of paper

louder and louder they murmur and say

slowly i feel my palms getting sweatier

a glance at the clock treads on my nerves

five am and not a single wink of an eye

tossing and turning under the covers

alone in the darkness i lie

yeap...for some unknown reason i was unable to sleep last night. at 5.30 am mummy and daddy were awake, and soon keith too. Keith was going to Paroi for the Ong Kee Hui swimming competition. i dont know which is harder, trying to stay awake when your eyelids weigh a tonne, or trying to fall asleep when your mind's as alert as a hawk. i think my final glance at the clock was 6.10 am and the next thing i knew sunshine was pouring in through the windows. it was well after noon and that pretty much spoilt my whole day. i was in no mood to read any HRM. then again, i really shouldn't be blaming mood swings now...

anyway, to be fair to both brothers i hereby congratulate my big brother, Kevin, for passing his Tax exam for his CA.

p/s: i better be passing all my 4 subjects...all this congratulatory wishes is making my ownself jealous.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

communication breakdown

i'm done with 3 papers, leaving 1 more to be conquered on Monday morning. Marketing Communications 211 was...unexpected. Lazy me had decided to spot questions, thinking that my lucky stars were shining tonight, but i guess the thunderstorm blew them away. Nothing i spotted came out, and whatever did caught me totally off guard. note to self: study everything or read horoscope before spotting questions. at times like this i thank God that i have a reasonable amount of common sense and a relatively good command of the English language which enabled me to write 3 pages of utter nonsense which hopefully sounded quite convincing. note to readers: talkology is an acquired skill. please do not try without prior training. Owell, what's done is done. Now i just can't wait for Human Resource Management 200 on Monday.

I was told that gymrama lessons for the months of November and December has been cancelled. There goes my part time income for 2 months. (Just when the pay is 100% mine to keep). So i've decided to get a job. But u see, i've got a rather sticky situation because i've got OBS from November 28th to December 11th (which i'm dying in anticipation to go) and then I've got Summer classes in January. I hope to get the classes which fall only on Wednesdays and Fridays so i can have 3 days off. so, whatever job i take must be flexible enough. I've narrowed down my choices to:

a. Group-X Instructor in whichever gym which would hire me. But for this i'd probably have to spend some money doing the course in FISAF first. Unless they're willing to train me. I'll have to make some calls to find out.

b. Marshall in Camp 5 again. I'll have a higher chance of getting hired again, plus i get to climb for free. But i didn't exactly enjoy working there because everything's so strict and uptight, and it's so far away. Then again, bosses will be bosses, and it'll probably be the same somewhere else.

c. One of those pesky sales assistants in some retail shop, which i'm eyeing the new NB boutique in Sunway Pyramid. Considering it's new and i could use some staff discounts on some of their products. But if it's gonna be just 30% off, then i have that privilege already. i wish Nike Women would open somewhere in Subang. haha...

The one i want most? a.
The one that's easiest to get? b.
The one i'd most probably be doing? c.


Thursday, November 16, 2006

mad people

i was on my way out with the family for supper when i saw this car overturned by the side of the road in a very peculiar position right outside my kindergarten, which is opposite the SJ Buddhist Association. They were gonna saw the car up, my guess, to get whoever's captured in it out. My mum thinks the driver was driving too fast (which is pretty much her theory to every car accident) but it's odd that a driver would be speeding on that road at 10 pm, because that road is relatively busy, and it's relatively too early for road racing.

but if my mum was right, and that person was speeding slash racing? i say the guy slash woman is mad.

anyway, on a much much brighter note, Keith got straight As for his UPSR exams today! so, here's wishing a humoungous congratulations to my baby brother!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

tough competition

results for powerman are out, and lo and behold, i got last place. well, can't say i wasn't expecting it. but it still bums me out anyhow. what saddens me was the fact that my first 10km run was the slowest of the pact. and i so wanted to get a headstart with my running. i thought that maybe the heat had affected everyone else too. but it seems to me everyone was running fine. i know i shouldn't be discouraged because of this. i mean, it still was a feat in itself, to have gone without prior training. and having to run under the sun and then, cycle in the rain at my first long distance race is quite a challenge. but who am i kidding. there were many there that day who were first timers as well.

just makes me think. have i really gone down? i know it's not right to wallow in former glory, but there was a time when every race i went for would guarantee me a medal in hand. doesn't have to be the top 10. just the top 30 or something. my dad used to say i was a "medal prospect". it was pretty cool.

now my timing have improved. what used to be 6.5 minutes per km, went down to 6 minutes/km and is now going steadily under 6 minutes for 10km distances or less. my stamina have improved by leaps and bounds too. 3 years back i would have never even thought of going for a half marathon, let alone a Powerman.

but competition is getting tougher and tougher. like my brother said, it's a whole different league now. and though self satisfaction has served me well as a reward and drive, i can't help but think that sometimes, that ain't enough.

oh well, doesn't deter me from wanting to join again next year. if at all, it actually drives me to strive harder. from now on, it's the full distance throughout the entire series. that's if there still is the MMDS and the Powerman, considering Malakoff shares have been sold off. and the aim? to not emerge last, anymore. coz i'm a bad loser. i really am. heh. :)

oh i've changed the layout because i wanted to get the blogger comment system back. and the only way i knew how to do that was to get a blogger template again. Haloscan seems to disappear pretty often. now thanks to blogger's word verification, there won't be spamming anymore, so blogger it is. and for those who congratulated me in the haloscan system, i just read them today. thanks a lot! i guess if self satisfaction fails me, i always have you guys to keep me going...:)

p.s.: i'm done reading Mary Higgins Clark! Finally, i can start on the Devil. But i have to say, Mary Higgins Clark is an amazing writer! I'll definitely borrow her other novels next sem. :)

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Powerman 2006 race report!

Before i begin, let me first say that my first two papers went pretty well. I'll definitely pass both of them, a credit or a distinction would be a bonus. :)

Okay, now on to bigger things. :)

Friday 10th November - I arrived at Uncle Peter's at about 6 pm. After being rooted to those darn library chairs for hours on end, i must've been a bit fazed out because i remembered everything except my helmet. Uncle Peter lent me his Giro white helmet which was plastered all over with the Ironman logo. i was worried that i wouldn't make it back from the 60km bike leg. "Must come back ar! Already wear Ironman helmet some more don't want to come back!". Pressure much!

When Uncle John, Uncle Alex and Aunty Christina came, we departed at 7 pm. I was hungry but we only stop to eat at 9-ish in Bidor. You guys know which restaurant. It's the famous Chicken Biscuit restaurant. But most of their food have finished and we were left with wat tan hor and fried meehoon to save our dinners. I was surprise to learn that Isaiah was already in Lumut. Ha! ain't no injury was gonna prevent that guy from the Powerman!

We were cruising along Teluk Intan when the car started making noises. We had a flat. It's almost humourous. I am ashamed to say that a big city girl like me had never experienced a flat tire before. Uncle Alex was on it like one of those F1 pit stop crews. So i had to kick start my inaugural individual duathlon with a bang! haha...
We finally reached Orient Star Lumut at 11.45 pm. I was dying to hit the bed. The past few days of drowning myself in Capital Budgeting was both mentally and physically draining. :) So when the rest invited me for a drink, i had to say no.

Saturday 11th November - I had no idea what time to set the alarm. I have never raced in the afternoon before. I was afraid if i set it too early then i'd be tired by the time noon comes. But if i got up too late, i'd be too groggy or i wouldn't have time to eat and let the food digest before race. It was a dilemma indeed. I figured 8.00 am was reasonable. But my handphone vibrated next to my face at 7.40-ish when Isaiah sms-ed me saying he was having a walk on the waterfront. haha...such an early riser. I got up, washed up and went down for breakfast with Uncle Alex, Aunty Christina and Uncle John.

It was the usual hotel buffet breakfast. I helped myself to a little more carbo and bigger portions too since i had planned to skip lunch. Isaiah and Mr Kee was having breakfast too so I joined them for a bit. :)

After breakfast, i bought 2 PowerGels and 1 sachet of Powerbar Endurance drink. I got my timing chip and started getting nervous when i saw more and more people pouring into the hotel. I wanted to go and warm up, but it was only 10 something at that time. I was a little jumpy, not knowing what to do next.

Finally at 11.10 am i went up to the room to change into my gear, stick the Gels to my bike and mix the endurance drink. After a few tries, i opted for 2 ponytails because the back strap of the Giro helmet was quite low. Once i was happy, i brought my bike down and left it with Uncle Alex and gang. I call them my support crew, coz they were all not taking part. I went for a short warm up run, eventhough i was told it was too early. I had to do something to calm those jitters.

Came back and brought my bike for a spin. Yazid called me as i rode passed him. Then i saw Yusri and Rameash who all agreed to cheer me on. All of these are OB Instructors. They were with the media apparently. :) Finally went back to get my bag and things and checked into transition. Oh Orient Star is a minute's bike ride to the race start. :)

After checking in, i went for a proper warm up run. I met Tang Kit Mun, the, then, little girl who overtook me in a couple of sprint races. She's only 14 and look how tall she's grown!Race flagged off at 1 pm sharp. i started off with Lizi who claimed she was already tired. Well so was i, but i'll die before i say that out aloud. I have this theory that if i don't admit it to myself, then it's not true. I was advised to go easy but i had my own strategy which was to nail the first 10km to get a good headstart. Zailan came up to say "Hi". haha...don't you think it's amazing how social races can be. i really enjoy meeting new people especially when running. :)
dumb cameramen waiting to be ambushed by some very very strong men

I kept on a steady pace, fighting every temptation to walk, but grabbing water at every station. I wasn't even going easy, but yet i came in after 1 hour 9 minutes. The sun was still high up in the sky. I was hungry, thirsty and burnt. Going into the transition area i lost my bearings for a while. I couldn't find my bike. Usually marshalls show you where it is but these marshalls seem quite lost themselves. I finally found it, got my helmet on and drank a big gulp of water. Heading out of transition i caught sight of the bunches of bananas and isotonic drinks. That's my lunch! I grabbed a couple of bananas and swallowed a mouthful of heavenly cold 100 plus. Still not too good with my balance, i struggled to peel the skin of the banana with one hand and chomped it down like my life depended on it. Did the same for the other. :)
After the crash course that Uncle Alex gave me, i was quite determined to keep pumping thoughout the 60km course. Much to my surprise it wasn't as hard as i thought it would be. I actually went on quite smoothly. People overtook me like nobody's business, like they always do in the bike, but i still felt pretty good. My only hope was for the tubes to not burst. God knows what i'd do if they did. About 10 km into the race dark clouds hovered above. and not long after it poured tigers and dingos! It was craazzzzyyy! Wanna know what rain feels like travelling at 25km/h? It feels like sand grains pelting upon my sun burnt skin. At 30km/h, it felt like icicles, cold and sharp! Shivering, hungry and soaking wet, it took a lot to push away thoughts of giving up. I especially hated when lorries zoomed past and honked so deafeningly that i swear i'm not partially deaf. Next thing i knew, i was done with one loop. Seeing that i did 30 km in 1 hour 16 minutes i was ever more determined to push harder, knowing now that i'll make the qualifying time. I had a Gel and could almost feel the adrenaline bursting through my veins!

The rain had slowed down to a drizzle, and soon it was just puddles on the road with a cool breeze in the air. It was perfect! I sped up a notch, with a 100% focus on my legs. I couldn't help smiling to myself, knowing that i'm gonna make it much earlier than i targeted. I was ecstatic when i saw the U-turn at 45 km and it seemed as though within minutes the transition area came into view! Euphoric, i was all smiles as i saw the smiling face of my ever loyal support crew, who seemed to have braved the sun and rain with me. haha...
After parking my bike, i tore out my other Gel and sucked on it. This guy came up alongside me saying "C'mon...another 10k more!". I smiled, saying under my breath "Bring it on...". I was really powered up. I felt so amazingly energized that i could hardly believe it. Sure i had the usual disorientation of the legs after cycling, but it wasn't long till i was pounding the ground consistently. I found my pace and started overtaking people, slowly but surely. It was amazing!

after the U-turn, i glanced at my watch. the feeling of sheer confidence that i'll be making it back on time is priceless. up ahead i saw Halim, this guy who runs around ss14, and i was game to overtake him. haha such is the gratitude i have for the guy who advised me to keep my toes on the pedals to give my legs more power. he was very encouraging. "you're looking good! go ahead!" and he made leeway for me to overtake. how nice...:)
it wasn't long before i saw the finish line again. Lumut Waterfront, though now already bustling with people who have finished long before me, was the most beautiful sight i've seen all day. The smiles on the faces of my dear support crew, the sound of Adele's voice announcing my arrival, i took in everything and it was breathtaking...literally. because i was so spent out. The first person i saw after i crossed the line was Penn. haha why am i not surprised...:) Got my medal, got my finisher t shirt, which by then have run out of S and XS sizes. I got an M size, but i couldn't care less. I could've gotten an XL and i'd still wear it with pride. :)
The rest of the night, needless to say, i was smiling like a silly monkey. Uncle Peter and gang brought me out for dinner at Kg Koh for some super amazing seafood. And then we adjourned to Jook's Bar in Lumut to meet Ian Tee and some other really interesting characters for beer. I had 2 bottles of Tiger. My eyes could hardly stay open by then.

At 2 .30 am Uncle Peter decides to go mamak! wahlau, i swear my head could've plonked down on the tandoori chicken at any moment. Finally, past 3 am, we went back to the hotel. I just hit the bed like a sack of bricks, dragging my sore sore legs underneath the covers and resting my spinning head...


I had so much fun. Many thanks go out to my amazingly efficient and ever supportive support crew, Uncle Peter, Uncle Alex, Aunty Christina and Uncle John. Pictures are snapped by Uncle John. I had a blast and it was all because of these 4 people. They made Powerman possible for me :)

I also appreciate the smses which came in the night before my race. I'm actually quite surprised to receive so many. I think i must've made quite a big deal about my joining this race huh? hehe...well, thank you. I feel like KennySia doing the KLIM...except that he had his accomodation sponsored. hehe...but you guys are the best! :)

And as for aspiring duathletes, this is gonna sound every bit as cheesy as some lamer who have just done an amazing feat, but trust me, if i can do can you...


Sunday, November 12, 2006

powered up!

yup! I'm alive and kicking! The Powerman is probably the most gruelling race i've ever done in my life and i have absolutely no regrets!

i'm...quite dead. i have a back of an 80 year thighs and calves tremble when i walk up and down stairs, 4 out of 10 toes have this stinging sensation when applied pressure on and here i am thinking not of my Finance paper tomorrow, but of the next duathlon i'd be doing. that's how totally sun-whacked i am. :)

race report coming up...after my first 2 papers!

p.s.: just in case you don't know...Finisher T Shirts are only given away to those who make it within the qualifying time of 5 hours.

p.p.s.: and for your information, 4 hours and 46 minutes of pumping those legs is no joke.

p.p.p.s.: therefore, please humour me. :)

Thursday, November 09, 2006

books. bikes. notes. shoes...bring it on...

Lyn's birthday this year was simple yet, classy. the woman sends me an sms last night saying that the dress code was jeans and heels. when i read it i laughed. it was as if we were celebrating the queen's birthday, what with classy dress codes and such. hehe...but that thought was quickly switched to thoughts of what to wear :). well, i am but a girl, afterall.

We started of with lunch at this restaurant in SS18 called TJ Haus. I've been there before, so i recommended it. Rosie was astonished that such a place even existed, and within 5 minutes drive from her home too! it's a homey restaurant serving european delights. it's halal, so it's perfect! :) i think we all enjoyed our lunch thoroughly. :)We adjourned to 1 Utama, since i am sad enough to have not been into Forever 21. Well, so hasn't Lyn. so we decided to that it's about time we did. Well, i expected it to be pricey but somehow coming out empty handed still disappointed me. If at all, that place does sell everything! The sales weren't really on, and the heels were killing us so we took many breaks, licking up gelato ice creams and slurping up fruit juices. And of course, doing justice to our once in a blue moon classy attire. :)
Anyway, Lyn, i hope u had a great birthday! it was indeed fun! just, bear in mind the next birthday dress code has got to be sporty. :)


I'm all packed for Lumut. I think the whole idea of being an Individual Participant just dawned upon me. And as much as i hate to admit it, i am a bit afraid of the outcome of this. But i carry a never look back motto (or i try to) and for all it's worth, i am never looking back for this Powerman. The shirt's real cool, i got myself a brand new Powerbar bottle, they've even thrown in a handy wrist pouch (yes that black underwear looking thing is a wrist pouch) and a Powerbar. I even get a finisher T Shirt! I was reading the e-briefing notes they have on the site, and i was just soaking up all the perks of being an individual racer! seriously, i feel a lot grander now. even if i did have to fork out RM100 for the race. and probably another RM100 plus for the 2 nights' stay in Orient Star. But it's all good.

Mum and dad have given me the talk about personal responsibility and making the righ decisions and stuff. No, not sex related. It's about my first final paper which falls on the Monday after i come back. And like i told them, i signed up for the race knowing very well that i was up for an exam the next day. Knowing very well that this is a much longer distance than i have ever done in my life. Knowing very well the risks that i am taking. And i intend to complete that race and pass, if not score, all my papers.

well, i'm Power Juic'd! Books. Bikes. Notes. Shoes...bring it on...

Happy 20th Birthday Lyn!

i have become so good at finding things to do...and by things, i meant anything other than studying. seriously, i can spend seconds on end picking out dog ears from my text book, minutes on end just humming and bobbing to music, and hours on end stirring up a headache and convincing myself that i need sleep. yup...after years and years and years of exams i am yet to master the art of studying continuously for more than 20 minutes.

however, i did spend over an hour tackling one dumb capital budgeting question this morning. one which i am yet to solve, btw. :) so i have the shortest attention span. ever. in yoga, the tree pose is supposed to help with focus. because you need focus to actually balance on one leg. however, we only hold that pose for a minute in yoga...
anyway, it's dear Lyn's birthday. so here's wishing her Happy 20th Birthday! i'll be hanging out with her and Rosie tomorrow. another reason why i really shouldn't be blogging now...owell...

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

nothing quite like you

nothing makes me smile
quite like your smile does
yet when i smile to myself
it's not thoughts of you that pass

nothing makes me feel so happy
quite like seeing you around
yet when i am laughing most
it's not with you that i'm found

nothing lights my face up
quite like the sound of your voice
yet when i think of who i'd talk to
it's not you that is my choice

nothing disappoints me more
than you not making a get together
yet the moments my heart was crushed
were those that involved another

Monday, November 06, 2006

10 km runs and gimrama competitions

all my life, my 2 favourite past times had clashed with one another. if it wasn't eating habits, it was schedule. if it wasn't physical build up, it was technical skill. if it wasn't the coaches, it was me.

from the moment i took up running and gimrama at the same time, it was as if i played 2 roles. by day, i was a carbo loading, daily (almost) training, muscle bound, just-propel-on-and-on runner. by night, i was a weightless feather, graceful from toes to fingertips, sweets and french fries absteining, poised rhythmic gymnast. i exaggerated the gymnast in me. frankly, i was still that carbo loading, mucle bound, ice cream scarfing girl who just happened to be apart of rhythmic gimnastics. but i am the author of this blog, am i not? =)

anyway, either was it almost always clashed. my gimrama coach always commented on my thighs. Marathon thighs, she called races, the dinners are filled with delicious carbo infested food and the servings disappear within minutes. in gimrama competitions, there's vegetable soup on the table and everyone sips it as if slurping it down would make up bloat up.

today, 7 years from the day i took up 2 sports, and 3 years after i quit one, i almost had to choose between the 2 of them again when the Serdang Angels Cup almost coincided with the SJ10K run. Lucky for me, the competition was pushed to the afternoon, so i could go for both.


This morning's run was...amusing. i started off without any target, knowing i have not been training much. Sam was with me again, and i knew for sure i'd be losing to him. Met Darren which was surprising. Met a lot of others too, including Seng Chee! it's been so long since i last saw him. we reached there with only a couple of minutes to spare before we flagged off, so i didnt quite warm up. started of steady...Sam and Darren slowly picking up speed and moving ahead of me...owell, boys will be boys. they say they don't train and yet they're kicking dirt in your face in no time. curse those testosterones.

about 15 minutes into the race, my stomach started to twist. oh no. i usually don't have breakfast, but i skipped supper the night before and woke up reall hungry this morning. so i had 2 slices of bread with peanut butter. bad bad idea. soon i had the urge to go. we happened to run by some shop lots and i really wanted to run into one of them. but, refusing to lose that few precious minutes, i told myself the feeling would pass. just keep going!

at about 27 minutes i couldn't take it any longer. everytime i decided to pick up pace my stomach twisted even more. i had to go. so the moment i saw a mamak i ran over. i have to say in all my years of running this has NEVER happened to me before. i thought it was hilarious. i would've laughed if it wasn't for the fact that i was staring at my ongoing stopwatch. have u ever been PRESSURED to do your business? it's like sitting on a freakin time bomb! pun intended.

anyway, as soon as i hit the road again, i regretted not going earlier. i felt so much more at ease that i broke into a mild sprint, trying to gain back as much momentum as i can. i saw Cindy who was actually very good. Further up i saw Darren...walking! ha! "Hey i thought you were in front of me?" he exclaimed when i ran past him and tapped his shoulder. i am....=)

well, despite the fact that i was running abt 5 km in agony, and the approximately 5-10 minute loss due to "unforseen circumstances", i managed to come in in 1 hr 2 minutes. not bad watttt....:) lost to Sam tho. which eventhough i was totally fine with it, he demands a rematch. one whereby healthy stomachs was a constant variable. hehe...


There were times when the little devils really upsetted me. like the time i was forced to choose reserves and they were all so jealous of one another.

There were times when they seriously pissed me off. like the time i rushed all the way from subang only to wait for them for 30 minutes because they take AGES to change out of their uniforms.

There were times when they really shocked me. like the time my tiniest, most angelic looking gymnast came to me and called me a "Stupid dumbass".

There were times when they left me feeling like the lousiest coach in the world. like the time i was shouting till my i heard my voice screech and all they did was sulk and asked where Coach Regina was.

but those times were worth every minute when the girls perform on the most beautiful carpets in the country, got last place, but lined up to have a picture taken with me or have my hand salam-ed or gave me a tight squeeze with their skinny arms.

there were times when they really make me feel like i've done the right thing. like today when they all came into the gymnasium with zero confidence levels, and left hand in hand alongside proud parents with smiles because they've taken part in a competition before.


anyway, check out this clip. it's of the team that won first. I swear, their coach is a choreographing GENIUS.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

goodbye sem 2, hello exams...

today's the last day of the semester 2 study period. as of now, the study leave has started and in 9 days time, i'll be having my first final paper - Finance 201. not exactly my favourite subject of the semester.

as always, every end of the semester calls for a review. well, truth be told, ive had the most progress in this semester compared to the last 3. my circle of friends seem to have quadrupled, i have a stash of certs from events that i've taken part in, and for the first time ever, foreign guys became an issue. haha...

study wise, i think i might have slacked a little. if i were to accumulate my sleeping hours, i probably would've had 2/3 of the amount i had last sem. throughout the semester, i had 3 reports/essays to hand in and ive done every one of them at the eleventh hour. and it doesnt help that i wasn't the least bit stressed for each one of them. but with all due respect, i did reasonably well i would say. i know i'll be passing la...

i got to know loads of people better, some a little more than others. some a little too well. but nonetheless, all with very interesting tales to share. thanks to my recent liberation from my comfort zone, and shakti's mission to so-called change, i get to hang out with shakti more during events and yumcha sessions with the others.

yup. a great semester. 2 more left! a wise woman once said "I continue because the end is near".


p/s: Uncle Peter called off tmr morning's long ride because of All Souls Day. But before i could gasp in delight, he told me it's been postponed to after SJ10k. "Weather training maaa". darn.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Dear porpor,

How are you? It's been a while since i last spoke to you. Busy with work, sorry. My bad. :) Well, the family just went for a nice holiday in Cherating and Tasik Kenyir. It was a very wholesome holiday, if you ask me. Everyone was busy occupied with something to do. There was something for everyone, young and old, outdoor or indoor enthusiasts. Keith and my daddy started this ping pong frenzy. everyone gave it a shot, including yehyeh! And you know what? I lost to yehyeh! haha yehyeh not bad leh...still very sharp and alert.

anyway, my friend's grandfather passed away today. and i couldn't help but thought of you. i know everyone here misses you very much. and you probably miss all of us just the same. but i think we had it easier than my friend. it's 1 week to our final exam. and 3 days to her birthday. such an event should not happen to her now. i called her just now, and she seemed alright, but i know she must still be trying to accept what just happened. i know it took me a while. i actually felt quite silly when everyone was crying and i didn't cry all that much. but know that i absolutely miss you very much. now and then i wonder about how your face would look like when you see baby en en, or teng jie jie's big tummy, or even my graduation. i really wanted you to come for my graduation.

i know there's this tradition whereby we give you all ang pow when we get out first pay? i wish i can give you an ang pow now. i've been coaching in sri petaling for some time now. and the pay has been relatively good. though a major part of it went into my Sydney trip.

anyway, i have a small favour to ask. could you be so kind but to send some blessings to my friend? she's going through a rough time now. maybe bless her with calmness and serenity. and if you meet her grandfather, go and say hi. i heard he's quite a jolly person. :)

take care now. i have an assignment to finish.

missing you very much,

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

heart warmingly inspiring

"Strongest Dad in the World [From Sports Illustrated, By Rick Reilly] Eighty-five times he's pushed his disabled son, Rick, 26.2 miles in marathons. Eight times he's not only pushed him 26.2 miles in a wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dinghy while swimming and pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars--all in the same day."

if 1 mile equals 1.61 km, that means this Dad did an entire Ironman carrying his son along!

i am at a lost for words.

Monday, October 30, 2006

short attention span

i have the attention span of an ant. i just walked out of lecture. the hall was freezing. and i was losing focus by the second. my stomach is grumbling (though i had forgotten to bring my wallet out with me). i was struggling to keep awake. Finance is dull. i'll get it for a while, and then i don't. and it just bugs the hell out of me that everyone keeps saying its easy! why am i finding it so hard to get? i get maths. i get stats. i believe i have enough sense in me to invest in a project that incurs higher returns. but i just don't get Finance. or rather, i don't pay attention long enough to get it.

gah. enough ranting. i think i should be getting back into class...

Sunday, October 29, 2006

i think ive lost over 1000 calories

i'm so proud of myself today. i had obligingly parted my dreams at the first sound of my alarm at 6.20 am. i washed up and put on my NBs. then i hopped into the car with my dad and brother, and headed to Bt Gasing.

Keith went swimming. dad and i went to meet Uncles, Cousin and some second cousins and aunty at Bt Gasing. It's always a joy to bring new people to that place. I feel like there's so much i can show them in there...rubber seeds, suspension bridge, bird tower, monkeys (occassionally). the little cousins were pretty good. some of them weren't from this area, they stayed over at my uncle's place. so they only had slippers with them. yet they charged down the dirt routes with zero difficulty. :)

i had wanted to consider that excercise for today already. but talking to kor on MSN, somehow made me decide to go for a run. the weather couldn't be more perfect, post rain, no sun. going up the hill was a little hard, but the moment i reached the top, feels all better. :) in fact, ideas started flowing through my head! i think next year, no matter what my position in Circle-K might be, i'll be organizing a health and fitness campaign. it'll be about a week or so. i'll maybe try to get Dr William Chan to come and talk or something. i actually have it all planned out, monday to sunday! Sunday being the grand finale - Hike up Bt Gasing! hahaha...

but yea...i seriously think i burnt up about a thousand calories today. feeling really good! :)

p/s: *yawn* im getting sleepy earlier and earlier! its barely midnight and i'm dozing off!

Saturday, October 28, 2006

what have i gotten myself into?

last night, kor told me to sign up for Powerman quick, before the deadline comes. i'm so used to being called by Uncle Peter that i assumed he'd sign me up already. since he didn't call, i decided to send him a message.

yes, i'm being very brave. not only have i never done a full individual Powerman, i have also never done a full individual MMDS (which is shorter than Powerman), and i have never cycled more than 40 km in my life. Powerman is a 10 km run, 60 km bike, 10 km run event. i know for a fact that on 11th November 2006, i'll be dragging my sorry ass back to the finish line on all fours. that's if i ever come back, God forbid i pass out in the middle of the race course.

it must've been quite a shocker for Uncle Peter and the peeps at Powerman because today i got a call from Powerman Malaysia!

Melody: Hello Karen! Melody here...from Powerman...
Me: Oh hi Melody!
Melody: Hey! Peter told me you're doing individual this time.
Me: *laughs* yea...
Melody: Are you sure? Long Distance?
Me: erm...yea [confidence level slipping]
Melody: *hesitates* well...ok la i'll put your name in
Me: okay thanks [hangs up before i can change my mind]

great. even Melody has doubts. what the hell was i thinking?? but that wasn't all. a while later during lunch, Uncle Peter calls me up.

Peter: Wei...
Me: Yea? Hello! Melody just called me...
Peter: you doing full ah? 60 km bike you know.
Me: yea i know...*laughs*
Peter: Its at 1 pm you, need training wan you know! How's your training?
Me: train...okla...
Peter: This Sunday you running SJ 10k?
Me: yup.
Peter: Saturday you follow me. We go for long ride in Putrajaya
Me: *gulps* what time you all leaving?
Peter: Leaving my house at half past 7.
Me: okay...[sinks into oblivion]....but i'm very slow!
Peter: don't worry we have one girl very slow also...
Me: okay...
Peter: okla. see you saturday ah!

darn. you know the feeling you get when you're sitting outside the principal's office, waiting to enter? or when you're next up for the Lisan dan Bacaan exam? uhuh...i walked around all day trying to shirk that feeling to no avail. So i got onto the exercise bike and did 15 km. made me feel a tad better.

now if i could just do that another 4 more times non stop...

Friday, October 27, 2006

the hottie

so i found out today that the hot groupmate is the talk of college. as in, i'm not the only girl who thinks he's hot. which makes him all the more...desirable...i guess. :)

*edit* purely a crush. nothing more. :)

he casually invited me to join him for that-meal-thats-later-than-lunch-but-earlier-than-dinner. i would've loved to join him, but i had plans to be embarrased by a group of crooning singing prodigies.


we went to Redbox today. we, being, Shakti, Anita, YeeYee, Matt, Adrian, YanYee and myself. it was fun. but i think i had more fun singing, very off tune, to Say You'll Be There with my RSGs. seriously, how can one sing unconsciously when these people have a vocal range of 8 octaves or something, and can reach every note with punctuation?!

*edit*video uploaded! here's Shakti n Anita singing to Menghitung Hari. You can't see anything, but the first voice is Anita and the next is Shakti. :)

then i caught John Tucker Must Die with YanYee, Leena and Dektos. pretty hilarious! yes, its a dumb chick flick but seriously, the guy's a dating mastermind. he's a genius! and brittany snow has the most incredible abs! no kidding!


on another note, i was blog surfing the other day, and i came across several blogs of my friends. there was this blog which Shakti sent to me. it was of this guy who pretty much has every post of his dedicated to this girl which he really likes. it's a pretty sappy blog, but i actually continue reading it till today. the guy's just so in love with this girl, he's greatest nightmare would be if he came to college one day and she decides not to be his friend anymore. he has this fear that she might suddenly think he's edging on stalkerish.

it just shows this other side of the male specimen. i mean, u usually hear all the sappy what-if-he-doesnt-like-me-anymore stories from a girl's p.o.v. i never knew that guys can actually have a girl on their mind like 24/7. in short, i never knew they were that deep. sue me.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

what is it about the trees?

there's something about trees that has this effect on me. whenever i'm in the jungle, or staring out into the sea with trees to frame the picture i'm seeing, or just looking up at the moon with the sound of crickets in the background, i'd feel this utter sense of sernity and calmness. and then...loneliness.

the family outing was really fun, no doubt. i played by the beach at Cherating, i found hermit crabs and jellyfish, i sat myself under a gushing waterfall, i played table tennis and pool with my cousins, i got trashed by my 83 year old granddad in table tennis (no kidding!), i had buffet for breakfast...the list goes on!

but like i said, the trees are infectious. i become darn emo la. so i think that the jungle is the most romantic place. sue me. i think that deep in the jungle, by a bonfire, with marshmallows on sticks, and a waterfall not too far away, is most definitely the best way to spend time with a boyfriend/girlfriend. where else can you find such tranquility? where else can you breathe in clean cool air from dawn to dawn?

i am so having a jungle honeymoon.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

waltz into my life again

only with you, i'd turn around
running back to where i came from
only with you, i'd retrace the path
flipping up stones in search for breadcrumbs

only with you, i'd stop in my tracks
just to recount the days we had
only with you, i'd see a significance
in everything that i thread

only with you, i'd stop a smile
from curling up my lips
just because of the thought of you
having your arms around her hips

only with you, i'd walk a long way through time
to heal, to move on with whatever life reckons
only to have you talk to me again
and have my wound pried open in seconds

they say time is a healer
through time we forgive and forget
they say time helps us move on
through time we forego our regrets

only with you, i'd let myself get hurt
i'd bear the tears and the pain
yet stretch my arms wide open
to have you waltz into my life again

i realised i have not written a poem in donkey years. considering inspiration comes to me in the form of heartbreak and pain, the lack of poems are a good sign. :) but i shall do justice to the name of this blog, hence ive written a little something from experience. it's annoying, really, when there is someone who just have that much control over you. almost crippling...yet in a desired way.

i'll be headed to Terengganu in exactly 6 hours time. its a big family getaway, with cousins, aunts and uncles, grandfather...should be fun! i'll be back only on Wednesday. don't miss me! :)

Saturday, October 21, 2006


CSO organized Trick or Treat tonight in college. At first they said to dress up is not compulsory. but where's the fun in that? you go to a party, you play by its rules, aye? i actually had a she-devil in mind. i searched high and low for a hairband with red horns. unfortunately, the ones i found were either too furry or too expensive. So i decided to make my own. I found the reddest paper i could find, and started folding cones. I taped them to my black hairband and coloured them red with whiteboard markers. I honestly thought it wasn't too bad. I put on this red blouse i bought several CNYs back. It had ribbons and laces dangling from the sleeves and the collar so it gave a slight sense of drapes or torn cloth. Then i powdered my face as pale as possible, drew dark rings around my eyes with eyeliner and black eyeshadow, and painted my lips with the reddest lipstick i could find. i dug out this necklace i got from a friend sometime back, never wore it before. it had red roses on it. i put on the earrings i got from Rosie for this year's birthday. also my first time wearing them. And voila! i thought i looked pretty devilish!
scary enough?

but alas, i went to college and 2 people mistook me to be a demonic CAT! haha...guess my handmade horns were too stiff...:) owell...cats are almost as sexy as devils. :)

i had a pretty good time. i actually did the make up for 4 guys and 2 girls. for the activities, catching crickets and frogs did shake me a little. especially the frogs. haha...i used to catch baby frogs in the Sri Subang Jaya field when i was in primary school. Now i seem to have turned more cowardish. Playing with worms however, came naturally. :)
yanyee, adrian, me

i'm glad i went. with all that's been going on, this was a much needed break. pity though Shakti had to go back to Seremban for Deepavali.

anyway, Happy Deepavali and Selamat Hari Raya everyone! Have a smashin' holiday!

Friday, October 20, 2006

when 24 hours don't seem enough

time, to me, has been travelling at double its speed. with so many things to juggle, my days seem like mere 10 hour days. as for those who are unsure of what i was trying to get at with my previous post, i was just trying to prove my schedule for a day. thanks to the upcoming Angels Cup, i'm up to my nose with work to do.

for those who don't know, i'm a rhythmic gymnastics coach at Sri Petaling primary school in PJ. My classes are usually on Sat mornings. But lately, it's been close to daily. I have to say this, my former coach Mrs Khaw is a genius! How she managed to choreograph for such a huge group, train us up in 5 days or less and still make us champs at the past gymnaestradas is a mystery to me. When Regina, my chief coach, and I got together to come up with a routine, we only tailored it for 20 girls. The next thing i knew, 25 girls are in the picture. at the next practise, 4 others show up. and finally, i now have 30. It was tough having to make spontaneous changes without compensating technical and artistic values of the routine. Regina works so classes on weekdays are carried out by yours truly, in between my classes. Whenever i have a break that's more than 2 hours long, i'm rushing to my car and sprinting down the federal highway to PJ. At night, i'd crack my head for balances, pivots and leaps to be slotted in whereever possible. These girls may not be the highest skilled gymnasts but that doesnt mean they dont deserve a chance to beat those angels!

There were times where i felt like i was the worst coach on earth. I was so afraid to offend these girls that i tried my best to please everyone of them. I tried being firm, but a couple of them ended up in tears. Then when it came to choosing reserves, i was at a total lost. I hated deciding who to choose, because when you see them dancing, they all just looked so happy! To strip them off the team seemed like a crime. And when i finally made my decision, i had to answer to their parents! Sometimes i feel as though parents these days want the world for their children at the expense of others. If i had come home and told my mum that i was a reserve many years back, she'd just tell me that i was not graceful enough to be in the team, and make jokes about me being "unrefined" like she always did. and i'd just laugh. but these parents seriously lack the sense of humour! they had 1001 questions, ready to bombard you the second you raise your voice at their child.

Thank God, things have settled down now. I have chosen 4 reserves, who actually, chose themselves when they decide to skip my classes. I have managed to complete the routine according to music. And the whole thing is finally looking more like a presentation. With more practise they should be able to familiarise themselves without me shouting over the music telling them what's next.

It is the week after the raya holidays that i am not looking forward to. The teacher advisor has requested me to have training every single day. And on the days which i say i have no classes at all, she wanted 1 pm - 5 pm. I am so going to lose my voice...and if i don't pull up my sanity.

on the other hand, my research group project is not looking very good. Thanks to some inconsiderate imbecile of a groupmate, i had extra work to do. because most of them skipped pretty much all the lab sessions, they know absolutely nothing about the SPSS program. To find them and teach them one by one was far too time consuming, especially since some of them are impossible to get on the line. There is one who was geniuinely eager to help me out. However it was too much of a hassle to get together in front of a pc and do the statistical analysis. I didnt have the time.

perhaps, it is partly my fault because I sometimes refuse to delegate. its just that whenever there was a group work in the past, i end up doing everything again because i felt what they did was under par.

In short, life has been CRAZY. The only upside out of all this is that i am finally done with my Leadership Camp report. But it's too long to be posted here. I hope it doesnt send readers into a slumber. :)

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

my tuesday.

6.45 am: Alarm pierces through the silence.

7.00 am: Lyn was knocking on my door. Practised the aerobics routine several times.

7.30 am: Went to SMSJ. Dewan Sri looks amazing now. Only 30 odd showed up. We did each song twice. Had breakfast courtesy of Miss Hooi.

8.30 am: Left SMSJ because Lyn had to send her porpor to the clinic. I came home, showered, went online.

10.30 am: Went to sleep.

11.40 am: Alarm shook me up again. Got ready CD, radio, notebook and raquet. Stuffed a pair of shorts into the bag, slipped into my jeans, went downstairs for lunch.

1.00 pm: Reached Sri Petaling school. New nice friendly guard who lets me park inside. :) A whopping twen-ty-nine girls came! had to shift some of them around, choreograph some extra moves, yelled my lungs out, reasoned with them that 4 girls will be chosen as reserves.

3.10 pm: Left Sri Petaling. Haze was pretty bad. The sky was glaring yet gloomy. Sunnies missing from the car. *shrugs*

3.35 pm: Reached Subang Raquet. The carpark was empty. Decided to stay in the car and so a bit more choreography. Leena came in about 15 minutes later. :)

4.10 pm: Joey's here! Lights are swithced on. Sometime later, the others come and announce that Mpiwa won't be coming. Rejoice! I know I'm evil but I just don't have the confidence to play. Joey calls Mpiwa to make him come. He says he'll call back later.

5.05 pm: Been playing with Leena for a while now. I think i play much better when i'm depending on me, myself and i. Guess i'm not much of a team player. Which is probably why i'm a runner. :) Yee Yee calls Mpiwa again. He's not coming! We walk over, Diane and Hoon Chuan clinch the gold, win win situation! :) Debating in my head whether or not to go for Yoga. Decision depends on where the rest are heading for dinner...hehe...:)

6.05 pm: Decided to go for yoga. The rest having dinner somewhere far away. Owell, i could use the exercise. :)

6.40 pm: Scarfs down toast with tuna and cheese. Headed to Holiday Villa. Roads are awfully congested. Started yoga slightly later. There is a man in class this time! hahah...

8.45 pm: Yoga ends. I'm beat. And hungry. And stinky. In dire need of food and a shower.

10.00 pm: Had a nice long bath. waited for Keith to finish showering. headed to SS15 for char kuey tiow. now i'm just beat. and i have more choreography to do. those girls had better win this thing. heh.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Remember Me

i just finished reading Remember Me by Mary Higgins Clark, one of the 3 novels in the huge ass storybook i borrowed from the library. At first it seemed as though it was a haunted story, which made me rather reluctant to read it at night. My imaginations can be very vivid at times. As compared to the first one i read, I'll Be Seeing You, this one was a little dry. The first one was more progressive while this one dwelled a little here and there. But nonetheless, the last few chapters really caught my attention. I read from 3 to 7 o'clock straight just now.

i actually stayed home the entire day today. it was supposed to be another morning at Bukit Gasing but Shakti fell ill last night and Mei Yen didn't want to date me this morning, so we postponed it to next Sunday. Which was good since i really appreciated a good long night's sleep after waking up early every single day of the week last week. and my fatigue was proven when i only pried my eyes open when my mum came into my room to fix parquet tiles at 11.30 am. that's 10 hours of sleep approximately. :)

had an invitation to climb at Camp5 today. but as i was trying to gather more people to go, the guy calls me and says that he has decided to go to Damai. so no climbing for me. and today marks the last of my 6 month period to use my 10 pass. i think i only used it 5 or 6 times. which is a total waste of money! i swear i need to get my own gear. everytime i go, i think about paying for the rented gear. don't really save much, do i? Camp5 sent me their inventory list for year 2006 and i'm dying to get a pair of shoes and a harness!
it poured in the afternoon so, i didn't get to work out again today. pity the people who went to Damai. hehe...burrying my face in my book seemed like the best option. the story became so intriguing that the next thing i knew it was time for dinner...

bet my dad must be thinking, "now wouldn't it be nice if my girl stayed home like this everyday. no need to waste petrol". heh.

shopping disaster

the girls were awfully playful this morning. i had a throat scratching yelling session because they just wouldn't listen. not in an angry bitch fit manner, but more of a raised voice pleading manner. they were climbing over my head like nobody's business.

so when i came home, i dropped down like a sack of potatoes. for some reason, i was drained of energy. slept till lunch time, where Mummy made delicious mee suah kiam chai teng. and then, considering i've already napped, i had an afternoon to while away. since Daddy wanted me to get him his extended warranty from Pyramid, i figured it was about time i called up Ju for some good ol' best friend bonding session.

got myself a couple of nail polish bottles from Sasa. and this SilkyGirl funky eyelights, green of course. :) yea was in the mood to shop for cosmetics for some unknown reason. then headed over to French Blues where i tried on a couple of elegant looking tops - the kind you can wear to a nice dinner function or something.
uhuh...i just looooooveeeeee butterflies. i'm drawn to them. :) they both fit rather snugly on me. if only i had an occassion to wear them to. *shrugs*

anyway, before we left, i dropped by the PC shop and got Daddy's extended warranty. then headed straight to the carpark and off to send Ju home. when i was about to leave Ju's house, i checked my handbag and the warranty was no where in sight! i don't know how it went missing. my memory failed me. the only thing i remember was the warranty card being too huge to fit into the handbag. i was unable to zip it. but what did i do after that? did i take it out? did i leave it in my bag, unzipped?? try as i might i just could not recall!

Ju was nice enough to accompany me back to Pyramid, where she went and traced back every step we took from the PC shop to the lift to the autopay machine to the carpark. she couldn't find it! We even went back to Ju's house and checked the fridge coz i took out a box of strawberries from it when i sent her back the first time. i searched the entire car and ground under it. just couldn't find it!

came home and told Mummy. Anticipated Daddy's return and then told him what happened too. His brows furrowed, then relaxed. and he just kept quiet! then he took the phone and called the PC shop and asked if he could get a replacement. the answer was no. he still stayed quiet and i just kept on apologizing. seeing that i wasn't getting a response so soon, i went back up to my room. then suddenly, he popped in and asked "Want to go jogging, Karen?" was drizzling tho, so Mummy went on the threadmill, I went on the bike and Daddy went on the couch. he wasn't mad at me. But he did tell me not to repeat my mistake. i feel bad...but looking at the things i bought made me happier a tad.

goodness i'm turning bimbotic. *shrugs*