Thursday, August 31, 2006

Happy Malaysia

so i decided to be a little more patriotic this year. there was this Project Happy Malaysia going on and there are over 30 bloggers involved in it. (me inclusive). unfortunately, i typed it all out last night and blogger bailed on me. so typical, i know.

anyway, i wrote a weird story last night. i considered writing another this morning, but i'm kinda brain dead right now. so here it goes again. my happy Malaysian story.

***
if you knew me, you would know that every year i'd disappear for 2 weeks in December. i have this little retreat which i keep going back to. ask any ex-bounder and they'll testify that Outward Bound is addictive.

2 years back, was actually my first time as a course assistant. course assistants are volunteers who go to OB to help out.

90% of the staff in OB are malays. its not that im a racist. i just thought that it'd be hard to chill out with them for 14 full days - u noe talk their lingo and stuff.

then there's the Project Trust people, who are like exchangees from other countries. In 2004, there were 2 Scottish girls Kirsty and Helen. They were really cool.

that year, my charges were a bunch of spoilt 13-14 year old brats. my watch was divided into the Malays and the Chinese who bickered and argued over the most trivial issues. it was almost nerve wrecking when they start complaining to me, pointing fingers at one another.

OB teaches lots of silly songs and dances and all those other stuff u do at camps. there was this one song called Bumble Bee and it was such a nursery rhyme. seriously. if i sang it aloud outside the premises of OB, ppl will start staring at me. heck, even kids will start staring at me. but i guess when ure in a group, and there's no mtv or channel V, you pretty much sing whatever that comes along!

so there was this one night after night cap, a few of us were chilling in the dining area. Kirsty and Helen were there. so was a couple of instructors, tho i cant remember who. i remember Adrian, our MPCA (multi purpose CA) was with us. And there were a few of my participants. it was already the 5th or 6th day for the participants, and by then, most of us were pooped. fatigue was etched on each of our faces, eyebags puffed under our eyes. all of a sudden Kirsty leapt into the air and started singing Bumble Bee. and as if on cue, everyone joined in! the energy was electrifying because we sung it over and over, each time speeding up the actions and beats. it was so cool!

if you took a step back from the circle, you could see how 2 scottish girls, a handful of spoilt teenage malays and chinese, a couple of CAs from KL, and 2 malay speaking instructors from i-dont-know-where, just singing and dancing together. it was quite amazing!

this story has no beginning, climax nor ending. it has no protagonist whatsoever. in fact it's such a simple story. but i guess when i was there buzzing along with the rest of them to Bumble Bee, i really felt like i belonged. like everyone belonged. so as cheesy as this may sound, that was a truly malaysian moment. :)

***

this is kinda late i know...but i wasn't really in the mood to write somehow...hope it was worth a read anyway. *shrugs*

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

i *heart* you, Beat!

many call her Bea, but i refused to. i've been calling her Beat for as long as i remember. so i'm stubborn. so i wanna be the only unique one to call her Beat. sue me!

Beat and i go waaaaaaay back. i remember vaguely a very very bubbly senior prefect in SMSJ who has super duper long hair bouncing along the corridors. *pictures image in head*. yup that's Beat in a nutshell....back in 1999, that is. That's when i first met her!

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Some people may think i thread directly in her footsteps. because whichever path she took, i was right behind her! from being a prefect, to going for OBS, then to attending Leo Forums in KL, being Membership Director of Leo, being President of Leo and even into the whirlwinds of rock climbing and mountain trekking.

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She has this effect on me. Like the common flu, she is contagious! It's like everything she does is turned into whatever the dictionary describes FUN to be. that is, until the point where she went on from climbing recreationally to i'm-now-pro-enough-to-own-my-own-pair-of-climbing-shoes! haha yea, that's pretty much the point where i figured she's gone too far for me to keep up.

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so while i'm still diligently renting shoes and harnesses and belay sets from the counter, my dear Beat has won several competitions! while i struggle with a really really slight outward slope (or overhang or whatever it's really called), she does a little one, two, hop movement and she's at the top, biceps bulging and all!

but i digress.

Beat has always been there for me. through good times and bad. though our roads have diverged - hers a more winding, more rugged path but with a handsome escort by the name of Jo; mine a flatter tar road that goes much much much further than hers :P (sorry i had to, can't give u all the credit now can i?), we're still very much as good friends as we were back during school days.

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she's now in Sydney, probably patronizing Coles for more pavlovas and hoping to claim from an accidental mistake from the person at the counter, having the time of her life. then, she'd go and chomp up a dozen Krispy Kremes and go to a lap dancing bar at King's Cross.

uh...yea...i'd imagine she'd do something extreme like that. if not more.

anyway, Happy 21st Birthday Beat!! *heart* ya to bits!

p.s: the emotional elements were meant to make up for the delay in this brithday wish. hope it works!

Sunday, August 27, 2006

alamakkkkkk!

click for larger image


i'm not pissed. i swear i'm not. i went all the way down south, missed one of my classes on Saturday (that's RM100 gone), paid SGD26 to be trashed by a parade of chic looking girls in midriffs and hotpants, came back to check my results only to realise i was friggin' disqualified. *curses under breath*

yea...i swear i'm not.

***


i initially wanted to take an entire week off. when i returned from Singapore, my throat was scratchy and i was sneezing my lungs out. the next day, my face was burning up and my eyes were all watery. but Monday was the final day of my Celebrity Fitness 1 week pass. so i tried RPM. with Hin Toong! darn cool i tell ya. i should go for RPM at least twice a week. confirm i'll do better in my tris.

and just now, i went to Fitness First for a free day pass. couldn't resist the Nike Rockstar Bollywood class. which to my dismay, sucked. owell, least the Body Pump was entertaining. the instructor was a chinapek who screams "Tripeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr (Triple)" at the top of his lungs. once in a while he goes "Check my butt! this is how you should be" and he juts his butt out, side profile. it's hilarious! i was laughing so hard i was a hazard to the people around me. I had 5 kgs on my bar bell. i initially wanted to put 2 kgs but the other girls all had 5 kgs at least. so yea...i have an ego and i'm not afraid to admit it.

so yea, instead of resting i had an intensive RPM and Body Pump class. but that's ok. because apart from that i did nothing. next week, training starts. the real deal.

Trailblazer is next weekend. i'm totally psyched! I can't wait! I've waited 1 year and 8 months for this! when the event got cancelled in January this year i was more than disappointed! then now it's back! and i'm going!

i think you can sense how thrilled i am by the number of !!! i have used. it's coming!!!!!!!

Saturday, August 26, 2006

the Vietnamese, the technician, the student waiter

you see i've got this Vietnamese in my group for a certain project. he's kinda good looking - tall, tanned, sharp nose, built. he speaks okay English for someone who took a 6 month English course before he started his degree. he's a basketballer. and he's funny. so you see, he's quite a catch in my humble opinion. plus, i found out this other girl in my course, a Korean, has the hots for him. (I know, Metro's quite multinational)

so that day we had a group meeting. but by a twist of fate, everyone else could not make it, but me and him. or him and i. whatever. so yea, conversation started. i asked him why he was here, which part of Vietnam was he from, how did he find our humid land so far and many other things you would normally ask a foreigner. it came to a point where i ran out of conversation topics and the lame topic of currency came to mind. i started asking about exchange rates and then asked him if he had any notes or coins that he could show me. so he took out some coins from his pocket and handed me a 200 dong coin. which i think is worth RM0.10. after examining it like it was oh-so-fascinating, he said "you want to keep it?". my heart leapt. not in the dramatic way, but you know, in a i've-got-something-from-a-cute-foreign-student kinda way.

so yea, final topic of the day was of course his "status". lo and behold...he's taken. by a French speaking, really hot Vietnamese chick. who's studying in France btw. he showed me pictures. she's Covergirl kinda hot. thus, ends the short crush. owell...i've still got the 200 dong. :)

***


i've got a new best friend in college. he's bald and he's cool. he told me i was fat sometime back but he is very much my life saviour. while i was promoting Rock4Hope and Heart4Hope he was always there to lend me a helping hand. he put up t shirts on bunting holders so i could catch more attention. he got me tape and staplers. he was my lelong speaker a few times. really i owe quite a bit to him.
today, as i closed up for the final time, he gave me a standing ovation. he told me how hardworking i was. and i felt so proud. i guess i feed on little praises like these.
but seriously, knowing Miles (or whatever his real name is) means you've got the entire Metropolitan college wired. figuratively and literally speaking. :)
doesn't he look like Ato Boldon?

***


I followed Lizamey and Chih Mei to Taylor's College PJ to dine and wine in the Hospitality and Hotel Management practical assessment. Thahirah came along. It was kinda cool. I actually think conventional courses like hospitality and management is much moreinteresting than the average business degree. our waiter, Maxwell, was nervous like hell. i don't blame him. his examiner was pms-ing. but really, i had fun! we had a 3 course meal, which for some reason stuffed me up. i couldn't finish my dessert!
the both of us (Thahirah and i) were treated by the both of them (Liz and chih mei). i feel so...appreciated. :)

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

NB Real Run

you see, when you go to a foreign land to race, it's very hard to draw expectations. but i always do. especially after my fantastic lucky outcome last week at Bt Gasing, underneath my humble facade was an expectation to kick some kiasu asses that was dying to get out. so it is needless to say that the blow i got did not only strained my calves and hemstrings even more, it punched brutally into my ego.

race flagged off at 7.45 am - a little late, but i'll try not to be a bitch. the place was sardine-packed! so much so, we were walking for 3 whole minutes from flag off. i was the only idiot with a hydrapak. but it did pay off because then i didnt have to rub sweaty shoulders at the drinking stations. i was happily overtaking them during those moments.

road stretch was 5 km. then there was a sand stretch of 500m. sand running is hard. it's like taking 2 steps front and 1 step back. i seriously had a hard time keeping my pace. after 500m, there was about a km of road again, and then back onto the sand for another km approximately. it's so easy to lose your focus when times are rough. subconsciously, i felt myself slowing down. i have to hand it to the race marshalls though. all along the route, standing about 3-4 feet apart were race marshalls cheering you on! it really made a difference. it got my head back in the game, maintaining my pace.

Singaporeans are REALLY fit. all the way i was not able to break off from the general crowd. so used to being amongst the front runners in KL, it bugged me that i was just-one-of-the-many here.

finally i came onto the trail running. now this i almost laughed. errected right outside the stretch was a sign which read "Jungle Challenge route starts here". i thought, yay! but all i ran on was a tar road, with potted plants on either side of it. Sure there were some trees growing from the ground which hovered somewhere above my head. Sure the road went uphill and downhill on intervals. but seriously, where was the dirt people!??! owell, i was forewarned.

i managed to run in before the clock touched 1 hour 1 minute. a sea of people were already cooling down with cold cans of 100 plus. slightly disappointed, i consoled myself that i just ran 10 km in an hour even with sand-running. i am, overall, satisfied i guess. :) many thanks to Kelvin for inviting me to join. and for all that he's done for me during my short stint in the Lion City.

p/s: Once again, blogger photos not working, photobucket not loading. photos tmr la. gnite!

*edit* when in doubt, slide it!

Friday, August 18, 2006

real runnin'


i love this picture. it's so cool! the person who thought of it was a genius!

yup, this weekend is the New Balance Real Run in Sentosa Island. It's a 10km run, which encompasses 3 different terrains. The race starts of with a 6km road run, followed by a 1.6km stretch on sand, and it ends with a 2.4km trail run. No reason why i shouldn't want to go for it rite? i've never done sand-running before. i mean, i tried to on Bondi, and my feet hurt like hell. don't know if it was caused by my running barefoot, or the intense amount of walking i did in Sydney, or the merciless cold weather. either way, sand-running ain't easy.

i only managed to do a single run session this week since Bt Gasing last sunday. but i supposed the 12 sun salutations i did in Yoga on tuesday, and the 1 hour Dance Aerobics i did in Celebrity Fitness before Yoga, counts as some form of cardio exercise. on wednesday i actually had the free time, but my bed had looked more tempting. it was the first thing i reached for when i staggered through the door, dumped my bag on my bedroom floor and dug the lenses out of my eyes. i literally plomped onto bed. 8 am - 6 pm straight, in college, lectures back-to-back, promotional activities in between - that, my friends, is en.du.rance!

tomorrow i'm leaving for the Lion City at 3-ish pm. Mummy dearest will be tagging along because there has been a change of plans. My cousin whom i was supposed to follow back on Sunday decided to take a day off to visit relatives in JB. so, me being the obedient college-goer, still reluctant to spoil my zero-absenteeism rate for tutorials for this semester (too early to start disappearing), would have to take the bus home on Sunday evening. and mummy dearest, being the protective mother she always is, cannot bear to see me take the bus home by myself. hehe...yea i know, i love her too. :)

alright. my vision is blurry from excessive yawning. i really should be sleeping. good night!

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

rock4hope, aching muscles, dresscodes, bodyfat

my days have become so hectic that i now blog in bulk eventhough it's only a day away from the last post.

Rock4Hope promotions have started in Metropolitan College. when Jia Yin asked for my help to promote Rock4Hope in college, i figured it shouldnt be too hard. all i need was permission (checked), manpower (checked) and a bit of scheduling (checked). but i forgot how extremely passive Metro students can be. i completely overlooked the persuading factor, the pushing factor, the thick-skinned factor. i'm a terrible sales person. if i ever get a job in the marketing field, it'll be the marketing exec or something. not the front line salesgirl. i'll organize the entire event, draw up a roster, pick dates, even transport stuff. just dont make me go "excuse me, sorry for bothering you, but would you like to buy a concert ticket? it's for charity". bah...

due to promotions, my days in college grew longer. i use up my lunch times to man the booth. which means i no longer come home for lunch. classes start at 8-8.30 and end at about 5-5.45. so that's approximately 9 freakin hours in college. i come home, absolutely pooped. yesterday i slept in Ms Connee's tutorial.

i'm happy to do it. i honestly am. i'd help Jia Yin anytime. i just need to learn to sleep earlier.

my legs seem to be in a great deal of pain. the ruthless terrains of Bt Gasing have really worn out my muscles. my calves and thighs are so sore.

when i did yoga just now i felt the tension everywhere. back, arms, abs, shoulder blades. it makes me wonder if i was so completely soaked into the race that i did not realise myself tumbling down a hill.

i had fun showing off my cuts and scratches on my legs to my mates. this is pretty narcistic but i admire my own scars. it gives me such a sense of satisfaction whenever i look at them. when i go to OB, i always wish to bring home more scars.

but i'm not all that weird. because of the hideous red lines on my ankles, dresscode for college now shall be long jeans. until they look less bad. but until then, the next time someone asks me "how did ure race go?" i'd be more than willing to fold up the material to reveal my marks of victory. *grin*

i went to Celebrity Fitness Subang Parade just now with a bunch of guys. the consultant, Liz, said i was a lucky girl. ha! perhaps if they all came home from US and were nicely buffed up, i'd agree. hehe...kidding guys, u know i love u all. :) but seriously. he-who-once-brought-the-prom-queen-to-senior-prom has become really good looking. so anyway, i went with Weng, Daniel, Kenny and Hwok Chuen. and we had this body fat analysis test. now i really really despise that test. because it never fails to tell me that i'm o.b.e.s.e. i had a whopping 23.5% fat! Daniel had something like 19% and darn Weng only had 8%! wth!! now i know breasts are lumps of fat. and i probably have a much bigger ass compared to them. but really am i seriously the fattest!??!?!!? why? why why why???

Sunday, August 13, 2006

being noble, feeling greedy and going green

Circle-K made a visit to Pusat Kasih Sayang in Klang yesterday afternoon. It was a home for the mentally challenged and might i say, i've never felt more touched. i've done m fair share of community service, what with being a Leo for almost 4 years in school and college. But we usually visit orphanges or run gotong-royong in parks and stuff. You might think visiting a mentally challenged home might be just as heart-warming as visiting any other home. But in the numerous times i've visited homes, this one left the deepest impact on me. First of all, orphanages are actually quite rich. famous ones, especially, get charitable donations so often that the orphans have astro to watch and good food to eat. their rooms are packed with toys given to them. sure, they're still deprived in certain aspects, but really they're fine. think of it as a lifetime summer camp.

But the home for the mentally challenged, that's something to think about. With its residents ranging from 11 years old to 50 + years old, it was a hard activity to pull off. Very honestly, we were at a lost, wondering what we should do, do we play games? If we do, would it be "hide n seek" or something more mature? If we sing songs, should they be nursery rhymes or "Greatest Love of All" by Whitney? we were at a lost. Luck for us, they were very easy to handle, contrary to what most would think. They were so loving and accomodating. we played a bit of telematch, and a bit of Hokey Pokey. We sung songs like "My Girl", Mariah's "Hero" and Disney songs. We had tea with them and helped them clean up after. then we played the radio and started dancing with them. Simple measures which makes them squeal with laughter! My heart went out to them.

flowers
paper flowers made by them to be sold

fun n games
fun n games with them


When we had to leave, we presented them with some household groceries (rice, milo etc.) and a cash donation of RM200. I felt so sad to leave. There was a 16 year old who kept asking me in mandarin "Jie jie huey chia liao ah? Ming tien mei you lai liao ah?" (Sister you're going home now? tomorrow you're not coming back?"). It was at the tip of my tongue to say i was going to come back. Just so i could erase the hurt on her face. sigh.

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Thahirah handing the donations to the youngest resident

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I'll try to get a hold on the contact number. it's a place worth visiting. :)

***

Yesterday was Ms Tan Lay Hong's 21st Birthday! She's better known as Grace to me. I just like to tease her with her chinese name. I suppose a grand 21st birthday party is what everyone needs. Hers was pretty major. catering, 10 tables, loads of relatives and friends, big house. I was telling everyone, it's been ages since i went for a birthday party. was kinda doubtful whether it'd be awkward to go for this one. basically we just ate and snapped pictures. i guess when u touch the 20s, games like spin the bottle falls on deaf ears. :)

subang metro ppl


yes, and for the record, i ate a lot. i had something like 3 helpings. hehe...

***

so i even had my nails painted for the occassion. this was an event i was anxiously waiting for, for 2 reasons. 1. because its been a while i've been off road running and was starting to miss the jungle. 2. because its a familiar route. :)

Bukit Gasing Green Challenge was jointly organized by Corezone and Friends of Bukit Gasing if i'm not mistaken. to me, the turn out wasn't too good. Perhaps it lacked the publicity. but anywhos there were easily 25 people per category. Flag off was at SMK La Salle PJ, which i found rather amusing. the school was buzzing with energetic chi this morning. we had the Fitness First group x Demo Team which always blows my mind. i really love watching them.


Group X


The Men's Adventure category flagged off first. My dad and Lifemou were taking part. oh and Isaiah too. haha somebody got forced by company to run. :) 2 minutes later, it was the Women's Adventure. I didnt have a hydrapak. So i made do with those draw string bagpacks where i stowed a bottle and a powergel in. The beginning of the route was a very very steep uphill road stretch. though i started with a steady jogging pace, i soon downgraded to brisk walking with big steps, less than 10 minutes into the race. ahaha...uphills kill, ok! i saw my dad further up. Ashley was still in view but was fast disappearing. i struggled up till the road mellowed to a flatter terrain. picked up my pace again and off i went! i loved down hills. even more in the jungle. i sped down the downhills on the verge of losing control of my movements. my bagpack swinging left and right. in my humble p.o.v, if you're not afraid to run down, then run. chances are you'll overtake many. people are afraid of descending.

the downhill stretch was exciting, though shortlived. very soon, the majestic lushes slope stood before me, threatening. remembering the times on Mt KK, i decided to take it slow and steady, which surprisingly also allowed me to overtake a few people. Dont you just LOVE trail running? that was how it was throughout the route. uphill downhill uphill downhill. in between there were road stretches whereby checkpoints and drinking stations were located. They said there wouldn't be any drinking stations! if i had known i didnt have to carry my bottle around! if i had not brought my Brooks bottle, i'd have left my bagpack somewhere.

the jungle floors were infested with vines that were infested with thorns! i lost count of how many times my foot got caught in those vines, scratching my ankles! i winced each time, but never bothered to look down. Did i mention how much i LOVE trail running? you just keep going and going without a care in the world! you're too psyched too even feel tired or pain!

at checkpoint 1, i was told i was the 3rd girl. i was ecstatic but tried not to keep my hopes up. Marshalls may have miscounted. i just tried my best to stay as far away as possible from any women behind me. i was running alone for some time. i only saw men in front. overtook a few men. but no women were in sight. i wondered how far ahead the 2nd placing girl was.

at checkpoint 2, they told me i was 3rd again. which this time i chose to believe. i started praying that no one catches up with me, because i was NOT up for a challenge. i was exhausted and my legs were starting to tremble! if a lady were to overtake me, i swore i had nothing left to chase after her. lucky for me, none did. :)

finally, 1 hour 20 minutes later i was on a busy road again. my energy level gradually increased as i recognized the familiar roads that led to La Salle. i picked up my running (which somehow has gotten disoriented after blazing through the woods). i ran through the finish clocking 1 hour 24 minutes, bleeding ankles and all!

3rd place, baby!


my daddy and i
daddy dearest

ben and i
ben, who decided the route they gave werent long enough

roland
roland. he runs in ss18. ive seen him a few times.

tough girls
tough girls L-R: zeus, ashley (the champion), i-dont-know-who, elaine, i-dont-know-who.

battle scars
yes, i figured one big patch of raw flesh on my shin wasn't aesthetic enough. :)

3rd
feel like first place :)


things that were in the bag:
1. Polar heart rate monitor watch
2. Fitness First thermos mug
3. Fitness First 1 week membership for 2
4. Powerbar towel

oh and i have to say this. i love my dad to bits! he bought me a Camelbak! 1.5L hydrapak just for moi!

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of course it took some negotiation, and a barter trade with the Polar Heart Rate Monitor and the FF Thermos Mug...

this weekend i'll be pounding the grounds of Sentosa fully hydrated! whoopee!

Saturday, August 12, 2006

its leaking!

my open wound on my right shin has been giving me problems. it's usually fine throughout the day, until i take a bath. once it gets wet, it starts to expel all this pus and the surrounding area turns really red. just yesterday as i was washing it with Dettol, a piece of skin/flesh/hardened pus came off. but it didnt tear all the way, some of it was still stuck to the wound. so i patched it back.

after that it started to leak! yellow juice starts to stream down. i have to wipe it every once in a while until the wound is dried up again.

just now i applied some antibiotic cream, Fucidin. it stung a little, and then in a minute or two, the wound started to swell up with pus again, just like how it did after contact with water. and just like before, it leaked.

i do love my battle scars, but this one's scary laaa....

Friday, August 11, 2006

michelin baby

miles: eh ah moi! *signals for me to go nearer*
me: hie miles! apasal?
miles: u sudah.....*positions hands in winged position, flapping outwards*...hahaha
me: ye ke? kat mane?
miles: kat sini *points to face* dan kat sini *points to hips*
me: yeala...saya tahu la. tak payah beritau saya...
miles: kenapa u put on? u tengok itu mindy semakin kurus!
me: saya makan banyak ma!
miles: eh ah moi! u jangan makan lagi la...


omg! even my college's technician comments on my weight gain! i'd better be weaning off those darn pills before people start to not recognize me! before i turn into the Michelin mascot!

on another (contradicting) note, i have increased my daily runs from a 5.4 km distance to 5.83 km effective this week. and i managed to run under 31 minutes today. ha! that's 5.3 minutes per km! it's the first time i timed myself in ages! and i only dared to time overall today. still afraid to sttempt splits. i have this fear that i might watch the time, try to beat my previous time, and end up burning out. i suppose i have a tendency to do that. so, all said and done, i don't know how long i have been clocking such fantastic (in my vocabulary) times but it's great!! yay!

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

so many times

so many times i've tried to see
the freedom that i've been looking for
the pathway to happiness was too blurry for me
but to get off the broken road was a chore

it did not seem right at first
to just let all of it get away
to release everything ive held on to
to get up and move when i'd wanted to stay

but a world devoid of the feeling of love
had seemed so much more appealing
for i was too weak and drained of strength
to believe what i was believing

i found myself not thinking of him
and thought that i'd been liberated
in truth ive taken one step forward, two steps back
because misery had not been evicted

though love may seem a trivial part of life
life without love, to me, is mundane
to watch the people around me in love
is in fact, the true cause of my pain



watching the 12 am One Tree Hill was a mistake. i'm now resigned to a night of emoness and self pity. it just baffles me that Brooke, the all-time slut in Tree Hill High, in all her bossom-flashing bitchiness is able to attract a guy even in a fit of rage. it may seem rather bitchy of me to say this too, but i do question a lot of couples these days. i'll be listening to one side of the story and thinking to myself what in the world does this guy sitting across of me see in she-who-he-calls-his-girlfriend. and the worst part is i start getting cocky, thinking that i would probably be a fun-er girlfriend if he were mine. then i'd start getting all green with jealousy because he isn't mine. he, in actual fact, still belongs to she-who-he-calls-his-girlfriend. maybe it's me in self-defense mode, trying to console myself. try self-denial.

how many times have i been told that i was picky...how many times have i been told that i have an unachievable criteria list. well, i wouldn't have to make a list if sparks were to start flying when i'm with a guy. yes i do believe in that shit. but unfortunately, sparks have not been flying. and i refuse to test the waters. because i'm stubborn. i'm old fashioned. i want to meet someone the fairytale way. sue me.

i need sleep. sleep brings forth another day. another day brings forth other things to worry about.

Monday, August 07, 2006

i.love.to.climb!

ive always loved to climb. trees were my specialty. my dad brags stories of how i'd used to run out to the back of my house as a child, sit up on a tree and sulk when i was unhappy. i don't really recall doing that, but i did climb lots of trees. i'd still do if they had not chopped off my favourite branches.




a trip to Camp 5 yesterday was the very thing i needed. Kelvin was in town and i figured its about time i use my 10 passes before they expire. I never really liked climbing in Camp5 on Sundays because its usually packed with taster sessions, but yesterday was alright. there were more season climbers than beginners. and most of the staff on duty were the senior staffs as well. so it was like meeting all the old friends again. especially adam *melts*.

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Tan poh leng & Kelvin


Climbing along with kelvin and i were tan poh leng and hooi lian. hooi lian had friends to meet up with. Turned out her friend was a funky middle aged woman with a hyperactive 20-something son! so cool! they gave me a lot of pointers. there was this particular orange route on the top floor which i was never able to nail since the first time i climbed at Camp5. i told myself that i would nail it before i resigned. and i never did.

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Wendy and son, Bali
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HooiLian, Bali, Poh Leng


Wendy belayed me. she had just completed it and was trying to help me do the same. however with whatever power invested in me, i lost again. my arms are completely useless sometimes. it took me a long long time to get just halfway. disappointed, i headed on to the boulder. perhaps my ego can be boosted there.

Bouldering turned into a camwhoring session instead. i think all of us were dragging our hands alread, that's why. except for Bali who was happily jumping up and down like a frisky lamb. Foong and Devan dropped by.

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camwhoring on top of the boulder


before i left, i had to give the orange route another try. Hooi Lian was kind enough to belay me. I think one would have to be very patient to be my belayer. oh, and very alert too, since i fall so often. with my repeated screams whenever i fell, i managed to gather quite an audience beneath me. felt quite embarrassed coz the route aint exactly hard. but owell, Tang wei or something was throwing me lots and lots of pointers. everyone else were basically giving me lots of support. with all the comotion, it would've been a downright pity if i still did not make it.

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don't u just love battle scars?


thank God i did. :)

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Even though the gods are crazy
Even though the stars are blind
If you show me real love baby
I'll show you mine
I can make it nice and naughty
Be the devil and angel too
Got a heart and soul and body
Let's see what this love can do
Maybe I'm perfect for you
seriously, someone shoot her or i would...

stiff

i dont like the fact that i've lost all my flexibility. i can't split, i can't arch, i can't do anything anymore. and its not like i got those overnight. all those years of work and now im a stereotypical non-gymnast. gah! maybe continuing gim for the sake of my flexibility was a good idea. haha...owell...

friday night gim has always been my sanctuary. while other friends have clubbing plans and dates to go to on friday night, i look forward to a good sweat in the ventilation-deprived badminton courts of Holiday Villa. now, i really dont know how i did it. seriously, the air in there is stale and suffocating. the carpets are dingy and dusty. [check out ther alliteration!:)] but i guess we have been thoroughly trained to work under such conditions. it never bothered us one bit!

i miss gim-ing.

Friday, August 04, 2006

sem 4 week 1

this is what i think. one can actually get enough of holidays. really. and the last person to say that sorta statement would be me. yet, here i am actually glad that college had started. because i can only have so many days waking up almost noon, lounging around my pc till evening, going for runs, and then going to sleep again at 2 am. funny.

so i've gracefully stepped into Year 2 Sem 2, which is also known as sem 4, which is also known as the-second-half-of-my-commerce-degree. yea, i'd stick to the last title. :) My first lecture of the week was Finance (Introductory). I have a good lecturer, Ms Con Nee. Only problem is she isn't as fun as Ms Juliana. She's nice, but long winded. And the friggin' lecture starts at 8 am on a Monday morning. bluek! Then i've got Human Resource Management 200. I simple L.O.V.E my lecturer, Mr Ronald Hor. the guy's such a cartoon. he's very witty and he says things you would never in a million years think a lecturer would say. i was laughing my head off during his lecture. haha...On Wednesday, i've got Marketing Communications 201, lectured by Ms Janice. Very professional, very knowledgeable, very i'm-so-good-u-can-tell-by-the-fake-accent-i-put-on. i supposed i could grow to like her. *shrugs*. Then it's Marketing Research 211. Now i actually like Mr Lim Teck Sun. He's very very nice. Very grandfatherly. So you can guess he's long winded. even long winded is an understatement. But yes he's very very nice. He's the kind of lecturer that would go all the way back of the lecture hall, go through all the students to where you are sitting and show you how to use your calculator, step by step. The fact that he's probably more than half a century old, doesn't make him very popular unfortunately. heh.

i study 3 days a week this sem. Monday, Wednesday and Thursday. ha! don't be jealous. I start 8-ish and end almost 6. which is just too long. takes away a lot of my energy for some reason. i come home and drop like a sack.

so sem 4 is looking pretty good. i'm still VP of Circle-K, in charge of promoting Rock4Hope and selling Heart4Hope tees, visiting Rumah Kasih Sayang next weekend. all the more reason to have a good semester. :)


***

oh, and i'm reading this book i picked up from the library on Monday. It's actually a 3-in-1 book, comprising of 3 novels written by author Mary Higgins Clark. The titles are I'll Be Seeing You, Remember Me, and Let Me Call You Sweetheart. I thought they were romantic novels. They're actually thrillers. haha...i'm still at the first, and it's very intriguing. can't seem to put the book down. can't seem to sleep with ease too. hahah...:)


***

this month's expenditure is rocket high. everything seems to fall i this month. i just used up my last pair of contact lenses. i had to top up my hotlink just now. i need to buy books coz my lovely seniors who lent me all their texts last sem is now in Curtin Perth. and to top it off, i joined so so many races this month. waiting for my July pay which is way way overdue. hmm...*drums fingers*


***

i just went out with 3 doctors, a doctor to be, an engineer to be, an accountant(??) to be, and 2 business students (including myself). we call ourselves the karate retirees. heh. okay so Ju and AunWoon still goes karate-ing.

it just makes me sigh happily when i think of how many doctor/doctor-to-be friends i know. i have friends in high places. hehe...

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

desiderata

when i was in PD, i saw a huge poster on the wall of the PD Marina apartment. it was Desiderata. no, it's not a hotshot of Hollywood with a wicked name. it's a poem. a poem i learned from the interviewers of United World Colleges. i attended the interview in 2004 and during the open discussion, someone mentioned Desiderata. about how much you can learn from it with just one read. at that time it seemed so weird that a poet would name his work so abstractly. when i went home, the first thing i did was to google it. after reading it, i completely fell in love with it. the poem did not rhyme. but it had so much meaning to it. it was pretty overwhelming for the words he used were simple yet piercing. it's the kind of thing that makes one nod with agreement while reading it. it made me want to spread it to the entire world because it's just so true!

Desiderata is famous. the poem has become its new meaning. speak of it and people will naturally relate to the poem. such is the impact of it. truth be told, i only just found out the meaning of the term desiderata.

de.sid.er.a.tum
n. pl. de.sid.er.a.ta
Something considered necessary or highly desirable

Go ahead and Google it. Desiderata by Max Ehrmann. and you'll see what is highly desirable.

On a lighter note, abstracticity (if there's such a word) really impresses me. While abstract art may not call to my attention, abstract writings do. when i asked my mum to read Desiderata, i told her one day i'll write a poem where everyone would read and nod in agreement. and it shall also be hung up on walls and be quoted in texts. better yet. someone would turn it into a song (because everyone knows i can't sing for peanuts) and that song shall be sung by lovers across nations. ha!

Lisa Loeb is my greatest idol. she writes her own songs and every one of them have touched my heart. how does one write like her?

someday...someday...

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

visual overload

yea i think i've been flooding my blog with far too many pictures. And far too many stories on my races.

well for the next couple of weeks i won't be racing. college just started yesterday. at precisely 8 am in the morning. waking up was, inevitably, a drag. it felt strange to be back in college. felt even stranger to write. my friends were already making plans for a big Friday night dinner at Shogun. well, i've got gim class with the RSGs. so i gotta skip that. it's ok. i figured binging is out of topic for a while. and any form of exercise is very much appreciated.

Circle-K seems to be very active this semester. we've got a lot of things lined up. though i'm grateful for the extra colour to my mundane college life, i feel like i've lost the touch. it was an all too familiar rush of thrill to start organizing again, to plan, to delegate, to make decisions. yet i'm doubting myself. i guess it's true i've lost a bit of my perkiness. now it seems a bit of my self esteem went along with it. hmm...

this is quite a pointless post. now that the high of races has eased off, i find myself stepping on solid ground again. solid, cold, harsh ground. *frowns*