It's not a resolution per se...

I want to do this right this time. My brother is always saying I should just try it once, train really hard and properly for one race and see how the outcome is. I'm thinking maybe it's time I test this theory.

I never know what I am truly capable of because I'm never serious enough to put in the dedicated hours of training for a specific race. I write programs for people every day. I spell out instructions and goals for people to achieve. I tell them if they want it bad enough they'll get there. Oh don't I know it. But I am utterly bad at keeping my own discipline. I just let too many things get in the way. haha...

So I'm gonna try upping my training this time. I'm not gonna fix a set schedule, because, well who am I kidding, I'll never follow it once I know it's a "regime". But I'm going to make a conscious effort to sleep earlier, eat better, put in more hours of training, and stay focused until race day i.e. March 11th - Brooks Half Marathon. And if that goes well, I'm gonna stay focused and carry on for PJ Dawn in May. And hopefully by then I've gotten myself into the rhythm of things, that I can carry on and improve all my personal bests for the rest of the year! :D

So yeah.

But work is going to almost double up on me in the weeks to come. I cringe when I think of the sort of hours I'm going to be clocking in next time. But it has to be done. If there should be a resolution for this year at all, it would be to get rich. Rich in knowledge, rich in experience, and rich in the pocket too. =) Come on, Karen, ga yau!!!

About a boy.

This is a post about a boy. He is someone whom I met a while ago, never really kept in touch with, but has recently reentered my life. He is really great.

This is how I describe him to my friends. On my first casual date with him, we hung out for about 5 hours, just talking to each other, with only 1 pint of beer. To be able to talk to someone for that long, without the influence of alcohol, and to go home feeling like I wanted to see this guy again, SOON, I thought that should count for something :)

He has this ability to put me in this happy, silly, daze no matter how tired I was after a long day's work. Spending time with him always feels too short-lived. I guess these are things you usually say about someone you just got together with, but I am saying these in all honesty and sincerity.

I just sent him off at the airport just now, coz he has gone home to visit his family for Chinese New Year. He'll be away for only 6 days, but already I'm starting to miss him. Gosh, I've got it bad, don't I? haha...

Happy new year, guys. :)

2011

A bit late I know but owell.

I cannot believe it's already 2012. Because a year ago I thought I'd never see the end of my degree, I'd never get out of New Zealand alive, I'd never gonna start work and get paid, and I'd never cease to tell relatives at Chinese New Year that I'm still studying. =\ Well, it wasn't that I thought I'd never see the end of all of that, but it just felt like such a looooooooongggg wiinnnndddingggg road that the end was very vaguely in sight.

But well, look where we are. =) SO! Things I did in 2011:


I learned to pick up the pieces of my broken heart.
I did a flash mob! *woot!*
I met Patrick Teoh and recorded my voice in a recording studio.
I flew back to Auckland with a changed mind set.
I met some interesting people around the world through Couch Surfing.
I rode with one of them on one of those big sporty motorbikes and went up to 200kmh on the highway!
I did Tongariro Crossing for the second time. ♥
I went clubbing in New Zealand for the first time and loved it.
I went clubbing for the second time there and decided I still hate it.
I went out with a soldier boy for a little while.
I went to Fiji! *yeah babyyy!*
I got my girls Lyn and Rosie to travel around NZ with me and laughed our heads off everywhere we went!
I skydived from 12,000 feet!
I graduated and got my second degree. *woot!*
I came back home and started work, for real this time.
I became Teacher Karen.
I earned my first big paycheck!
I had the most number of foreign friend visitors in my life.
I ran free workout sessions for a bunch of friends and (think) I managed to convert some of them into exercisers now!
I did The Legend marathon in Auckland.
I did Cycle Malaysia.
I did Powerman again!
I finally did Penang Bridge marathon and it was horrid.
I got hyperthyroidism again. *boo*
I attended a whole bunch of weddings.
I got myself a new sister-in-law.
I met someone else who makes me laugh. =)

2011 was a pretty good year, looking back at it. I think I achieved a lot, explored a lot, and learned a lot.

Well, here's to an even more awesome 2012!

On love

In 2009 I created a post with the exact same title, "On Love". It was a birthday dedication to a boy I loved very much at that point in time, and it captured the very essence of my heart. I think that Love which you grow in time as you get to know a person, get to recognize the things which makes you smile, and those which make you hold your breath, as you learn their flaws and turn them into affection, and as you feel the need to be the reason that person is happy, is a truly amazing thing. That, to me, is Love in its purest form, and the kind which takes forever to shut down because you so carefully nurtured it through time.

Marriage, through my simple eyes, is a public announcement of that love. It is like that Facebook update that you were so happy about, you wanted your 1000 plus subscribers to know about it. It is the promise that I have fallen in love with you, and I do not intend to climb back out. To be so sure that nobody else in the world would make you happier than the person next to you, is a big call - and a brave one at that.

Not many people have the opportunity to meet Love this way. And among those who do, not all of them are lucky enough to have their feelings requited. And so I think that those who make it all the way to marriage, and all the way past years and years of marriage to their deathbed, I think they're heroes.

Congrats Kor and Ah Soh! :D

Today my brother married the love of his life. It was something about his smile, the radiance in his face, the spring in his step, and the song in the way he talked, (and this is the big brother who could make me cry by scolding me via online chat), I could tell he was very happy. :)

I want that for myself. (And I've said that to practically everyone). One day. =)

My 2012 wish list

I've been a little greedy lately ever since I started to see money in more than 3 digits coming into my bank account every month. It's a wonderful feeling having (some) financial freedom! But like always, it is a lot of money but never enough. There is a host of things I really want to get so I've decided instead of making resolutions I shall make a wish list of items I wish to purchase over the period of next year. Here goes:

Hand Blender:

 

Ever since I stayed with SherMayne in her flat my first semester in New Zealand, I've fallen in love with her hand blender and I think it's the most awesome invention ever. I want one.

Handphone:

 

My phone is still functional, but it is kinda tiny and it has served me well for 2 years come June next year. So I figured it's time to put aside the old and make room for the new!

Laptop:

 

I want a new laptop, and it wouldn't hurt if it looked something like this! Haha...but I need a new lappie to replace my 4 year old Dell Inspiron.

Smexy workout gear:

 

I want some new smexy work out gear for my job! :D

A crib:

And of course, I want my own place.

*edit* I forgot! I want one of this too!

Coz I need to get my game on next year if i want to get myself involved in the sport again.

So, time to make money.

On Work.

Sometimes I cannot believe how amazingly real my dreams are turning out to be. The satisfaction of seeing the opportunities come calling on me one by one is enough to drive me forward every single day. A handful of years ago, I had a vision that everything would be like this. I had a dream that the industry would swell up in due time, and that studying a course I was interested in would give me a step up in my career. I had a dream that the fitness industry would be various and ever growing. And not all of my childish dreams come true. So the fact that this one is becoming a reality, it's pretty overwhelming.

Here I am, with less than 6 months of being in the industry in my homeland, and already I have been approached by so many people with such various and interesting job offers! And I feel extremely lucky. I think the stars are aligned in the universe for me or I must've done something quite right in the past to be getting such opportunities but whatever the reason, I am very very grateful.

Though, with the abundance of job offers comes a great sense of responsibility to live up to the industry's expectation of me. I have been feeling nervous and anxious lately, simply because I don't know if I am as good as they think I am. My dad says I have self esteem issues, and maybe I do, but I wasn't the top of the class in uni, and so I sometimes feel a little unsure of myself. But make no mistake that I am more than willing to research on the issues at hand, and to learn as much as I can from the veterans of the industry that my good karma has allowed me to meet. I really don't want to mess things up, because I think a good reputation is hard to built, but once I obtain it, I am pretty much "invincible". =)

And that, is the kind of person I plan to be someday.