* strange encounter *

I think I should be more careful of the people i meet in future. 2 random encounters have landed me in tight spots. I think sometimes i trust too easily. Could be possible that I was on the verge of being desperate at one point. I really don't mind admitting that. loneliness does strange things to u...I have now learned not to let my guard down that easily. The good news is, i would probably trust ppl less easily, therefore sparing myself from more strange encounters. The bad news would be, that i have formed a superficial shell around me that may harden me from the world. This has happened to me before. I found it hard to trust, therefore hard to love as well. I had my little crushes, but none were deep enough for me to commit. Broke a few hearts during that period, which lunged me into a deeper fear of commitment. Guilt tastes more bitter than rejection. That's what I realised.

Anyway, someone called me today on my handphone. The first thing he said was "guess who I am?". I personally hate this question. If it was from a close friend I don't mind it. But if it's from an unfamiliar voice, I hate it. Gives me the creeps. Anyway, the hints he gave were sufficient and I found out who he was. He happened to be a cyber friend of my friend's (note: not mine). He just called to ask how i was and all. Proposed to meet up sometime too. I was freaking out. He had been trying to go out with me since the time i met him, which was, according to him, 6 years ago. Yup. I'm not sure how old he is but not less than 5 yrs older. He had been begging my friend for my contacts since then. I think i recently gave him my hp thru friendster. Don't ask why. The conversation was casual, though I was freaking out. Anyway, we didn't make any specific plans to meet and so on, but he was sure that we would one day. I just hope i can come up with a good excuse when that day comes...

yup...that's it. Not very strange to some of u, but i'm not a meet-and-date kinda girl. So it is strange to me. I have not seen this fella since form 2 i think. And he claims he updates himself about me thru Friendster. Creepo.

i do not know when exactly
that i'd see myself hand in hand
with someone meant for me
on someone that i can depend

i do not know how exactly
that i'm gonna find myself one
a person who'll love me for me
just by being with me, we'll have fun

i do not know why exactly
that finding the perfect person seem so hard
that the list would go on endlessly
before, as the one, i would regard

all i know is when that happens
at that moment in time exactly
when the warmth in my heart deepens
i know i will be ready...