romanticism

i sometimes think Disney spoiled me. i grew up loving the perfect fairytale, praying that my Prince Charming exists, imagining my own happily ever after.

almost everyone who have had the chance to talk to me a little more would know that i am a hopeless romantic - as hopeless as you can get. i may try to be a tough girl, but i'm a sucker for romantic fools. love notes, surprise presents, romantic getaways, handmade stuff, home cooked dinners, star gazing, moonlight admiring, fireworks, Ferris wheels, unplanned holidays - i could go on forever.

the silliest thing is i can think of a billion ways to be romantic. i have a pretty good idea of what romantic is. very often i find myself just thinking, if i slipped him a chapter of a book i really liked, maybe he'd go and read it and make that happen. or if he overheard someone on the street saying something i always say, he'd think of me and smile, and send me a text telling me what just happened. or if he rummages through his room one day, and finds something i gave to him a long time ago, and decides to wear it out and tell the next person who compliments "Yeah she got it for me." or maybe one night after hanging out with the boys with some booze and all, he gets home, stares at his room, and suddenly wishes he could talk to me. and he'd call me in the middle of the night, well aware that i'd be sleeping, but he'd want to hear my voice anyhow.

because i think i do these things. i'm built that way, maybe. and also coz i somehow know a couple of pretty romantic guy friends who shower their girlfriends with so much love and spontaneity. but yea, i realise because i can think of such crazy romantic ideas, it's very easy to fall short of my expectations.

i actually had this conversation with D sometime ago. about how guys seem to be the sweetest things on earth when they're hot on their pursuit, and probably the first few months to a year of the relationship. but after a while the fire kinda dies, and i don't know if all girls think like me, but i actually wonder "What happened?". His debate was that after a year, wouldn't you want something that is more stable, less hoo-ha, but more grounded, someone you can count on?

i dont know. if you were that crazy over her when you first saw her, shouldn't u still be that crazy over her 2, 5, 10 years down the road? i'd like to think so anyway. shouldn't the sight of her laughing, her eyes wide with surprise, her blushing cheeks still give you a sense of satisfaction? and it doesnt mean that the crazier the things u do for her, the less stable, less responsible you become.

some guys think being romantic requires a lot of money. what they don't know is that the greatest romantics, i reckon anyway, are the ones who don't even need to spend a dime and can still make their women feel like they fell in love for the first time all over again. like seriously, say you've just gone out on a date, he sends you home, few days later, rummaging through your handbag you find a small note in his handwriting which says "Hey". nothing else. fills your heart with warmth, i tell ya.

i still keep that note in my handbag, by the way. and right up till now i still accidentally come across it sometimes. the effect it has on me never fails. =)

yes, he was once the Prince Charming i had dreamed of for a very long time. he'd lift me up so high sometimes i forget to come back down. and i think he still is...sometimes...when he decides to be =). it usually takes the last 48 or so hours before flying off to ignite the romantic in him again. but glad to know it is still there, accessible when he wants to.

i've never been in any serious relationship before this, so i don't know how the general curve goes. but i'm pretty confident i'm not the only one who wishes the line never plateaus....