Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The final whine.

"I can't stand it. She's so whiny!" says a friend about the protagonist of Eat Pray Love, a book which I've recently picked up and started reading because I couldn't bring myself to continue to read The Girl Who Played With Fire.

I had just watched the movie Eat Pray Love, and I thought it was quite good. I really liked it. But I don't know whether it's due to the fact that I'm pining for someone myself, thus, I felt some sorta empathy for her.

So do I whine? Am I being whiny right now to the friends I confide in?

After thinking about it for a while, I think I do. Actually, I know I do. And in my efforts to not annoy my friends, I try to keep it to a minimum, hence I keep more things bottled up inside of me and put on a brave smiley front whenever I see them, until I eventually explode at the slightest trigger, say spilt juice. This has happened more than once.

It's almost 3 months since the break up, a deadline I've given myself to end my pathetic sobs and whines and forget the heartbreak altogether. I know it would be no easy task as I still think of him dearly every day, and I miss him terribly. The sight of couples on the street and in shopping malls, even watching my friends and their boyfriends, get me down. =(

I wonder if he has found someone new by now. And I wonder if I saw him and her together, I'd be able to move on quicker. I know it would crush me to the ends of never, but at least it would give me a sense of finality. Maybe if I saw that he has already invested his heart in another, I would be able to mend my broken machine and do the same for myself.

Maybe. Sigh.

And this shall be my final whine.


Anonymous said...

It will be nice that you should talk to him again, a simple one. To end this trauma and get ready to start a brand new you.

evelyn RBC said...

i feel u Karen. esp de last 2 paragraphs. been thru it n overcame it n came up ever strong. time wil heal de wounds but oni if u wud allow it too. letting go completely is de hardest thing n i remembered i wasnt willing n stil hanging on tightly in de hope tht situation wil change n things wil b all lovey dovey again. it didnt n believe me, it wouldnt do u any good to bump into him n his other half (if he has)or even to come to knw bout it. it'll even b more devastating until n unless de broken heart has been completely healed. stay strong Karen. God has lotsa beautiful things instore fr u in life.. tap into it n embrace every sweet moments in ur daily life