Picking up the pieces

The biggest obstacle I seem to face these days is picking up the pieces of my broken heart, as drama-queen as that may sound. I don't know if it is somewhat psychological, but I almost don't want to recover and move on. I feel as if I want to stay here in my rut, wallow in pity, and cling on to memories I held so dearly for the past few years.

But recently I sat down and spoke to probably the wisest people in my life, the ones who know me inside and out, and understand me even when I sometimes think they don't - mum and dad. It was a long, heavy, emotion-stricken conversation, and I sobbed like I did when I was 5. But I woke up the next day feeling a whole lot better, albeit with puffy eyes.

Ever since then, I've felt lighter. I feel like I can finally be happy for the ones who are happy around me. I feel less jealous of them, and a little more accepting of my current status. I've also begun exercising again, which is really great for the soul. I guess you could say I'm smiling again. Sincerely.

It's exactly 2 months ago since that phone call. I still do think of him every day, wondering what he's up to, where he is, and how he's getting along. I still reminisce happy times. But I guess I am slowly starting accept things. What was it? Don't feel sad that it's over, be glad that you've had it at all? Something like that.

Yeah, I'm glad I met the boy. He gave me some of the best times of my life, and I'll never forget them. But we'll let chips fall where they may. =)