go holiday!

haha...seela me...can't wait for hols...
apparently AirAsia giving cheap rates till June next year. Feel like going for this la...looks really relaxing...and my cousins who went for a honeymoon to Phuket called it heaven. so i wanna go! It'll really help me rewind at a time like this...haha oh well...105.7 seems to be helping too...the wonders of music...would have listened to my Norah Jones but the disc is in my car...

I believe today I feel faith
I feel a sense of assurance
I finally see the picture
I finally feel confidence

I guess today I feel hope
That it may turn out well
It may just be perfect
It will work, I can tell

I also guess today I realised
How much I need my friends
I should never have doubt
That on them I could depend

I just wanna say thanks
For just being there for me
You have no idea how much
Weaker I can actually be

But your support gave me strength
Made me beam at the face of stress
Kept me going at worst of times
Drew me back from being depressed

On saturday I'll give my all
I'll be at my best, top form
I promise you a good show
On saturday i shall perform!

thanks weng lum and julie for filling in on the MC, thanks shirlyn for waiting for me to practise, thanks hisham and rosie for coming to watch, thanks thanks thanks! Love u all so much! It's all for a good course i promise! thanks again!
Spiderman 2 is still on ok! sorry for postponing for the umpteenth time! Sunday sunday! we'll TRY our best to tau kai from karate! =)

"i told her i loved her..."

I just watched Gilmore Girls just now and as usual i get the sinking feeling in my heart. Dean...there should be more Deans in subang jaya. haha....

I once told myself that I would try
To lay off love for a long while
I vowed to myself no more guys
But I guess that was a denial

I denied the fact that I was playful
And that I'd fall again and again
Painting my history colourful
With the many shades of joy and pain

I had so many in my sight
But honestly, only few dwelled in my mind
These were the few that brought light
The few that were of the special kind

Life went on no matter what
As more memories decorated my journey
Till one day I'd reach within my heart
I'd stop and replay the memory

Some will bring me loads of laughter
While others, will draw out tears
And these will be memories of us together
Sharing smiles and conquering fears 

Today is one of those days, i guess
Where i took a walk down memory lane
I was silly and naive, i confess
At times, even downright insane

Looking back now, I laughed till i cried
Welling up, i guess, are all my emotions
I felt all warm and woozy inside
Thinking about our life devotions

Who knows when the next day will come
And i'd be remembering this very day
Then, I'd be counting the sum
Of memories I've gathered along the way

When that fateful day arrives
I'd have a 2 dimensional memory
I'd remember the day of my life
That I remember my life's history

makes sense? hmmm...nvm....
My shoebox treasure holds so much value...u guys should come to my house one day and i'd show you everything. Trust me you'd find it interesting. That shoebox will follow me to university, work, marriage...till the day I die. I'll see if the weight increases as i go along. Seriously, if any of u wanna read 'em, jus show up at my hse! =)
oh btw, Jess said the words above...not Dean...and that's after 2 years Jess did not see Rory. How often does a guy love a girl for 2 years after they break up? I'm talking teenage relationship here. Doesn't happen very often from where i come from.

treasure shoebox

u noe...i've got this shoebox filled with letters my friends used to write to me. that's rite, letters. these letters were exchanged even if we were in the same class sitting next to each other. haha those were the days. anyway, i was looking through it just now and found something really hilarious. just couldn't resist showing it to u guys...try guessing who the initials were ok? hahah still laughing here.

Hey ju, the rumours bt u & K spreading more lar... - Karen
Aiyo..how lar? die lor..but i still haven't hear yet..u help me ask them stop lar...pls.. - Julie
yup...doing so...just now lar...i was walking past the labs...then hooi lian pull me, ask whether u together with him onnot. then i say no. then she said K mailed her friend saying he's got a gf adi. so HL ask Fang (of all ppl) then...u noe lar.
oh..so thats where you were! wuz waiting 4 u until it was 2 late..aih, fang ar the trouble maker..i aso dunno wattodo now! teruk lar he..ken aso another one!
dat's why lar...i scared la that this K is becoming desperate.
yeah, i think he is..aih, dem beng! goodlah its not true but still i duwan the rumours!!
dunnolah...dun think they'll go n ask u...all come n ask me one...
aiyah..if liddat then u knoelah wat to do..thanx kar! if not i sure v. sanfu!
yupyupyup!
-N- 
 
note that every word is exactly like it is in the paper. no modifications or additions.
hahaha...sorry ju...have to malukan u a bit...haha the next post i'll put something that is at the expanse of myself la k! ahah i seriously find it farnee...tsk tsk tsk....julie julie...why la go attract so many ppl!?!? see! until i had to play messenger....had to help u put out rumours! ahahah

crispy prawn burger

Today's Physics wasn't too bad
Although I knew I could've done better
Once again I didn't try my best
Didn't start studying earlier

But to me it was an improvement
I think I learned more today
Than the past 1 week compiled together
That I'm proud to say

Today I seemed more focused
After spilling out things last night
Today I started as a new me
And things actually looked more bright

Let's see if I can make it for bio
Let's see if I'll try harder
Maybe for once, I'd take things more seriously
For once, I'd be an A scorer

haha dunno what got into me last night. just was in the mood to let everything out. anyway, made me feel a lot better this morning.

anyway, I've got a crispy prawn burger to chomp down. My stomach's grumbling. I seriously think there's somethign wrong with my metabolic rate or digestive system. It's working OT. I'm getting hungry too fast! getting sleepy too fast also...haha chow peeps!

just wonderin'

For once in a long time
My mind tonight is clear
I finally feel at rest
Finally free of fear

But an empty mind brings forth more
As i drift deeper into thoughts
It seems as though it's been a while
I brought up memories and what nots

I used to ponder during this time
About what happened during the day
Analysing it from different perspectives
Every move and word i do or say

I used to wonder what people thought
What are the impressions i gave away
Sometimes I end up regretting
My actions for that day

Guess in certain ways I was picky
A perfectionist when it came to character
I fussed about what people thought of me
And was bugged by the hatred factor

I tried my level best
To be well liked by one and all
I hate giving wrong impressions
And people to see my fall

Then I reached a phase in life
Where a crush took hold of my head
Then, the only thoughts i minded
Were the impressions by him instead

I didn't care what others think
As long as I could make things right
Whenever I was around this guy
Whenever he was in sight

Thinking about the things I did
Just trying to catch his attention
The memories I cannot get rid
Even if now I've come to realisation

I realised now that what people thought
What their impressions of me are
Should be the least of my worries
Shouldn't let it be a scar

But old habits die hard, I'd say
And once in a while I'd start pondering
How have his impressions of me changed by now
Don't need an answer...just wondering....

u know...i actually lunged into the topic of my ex relationships in the poem and i suddenly realised that my blog's too public to go into that. ahha...so anyway, just a brief summary of my point tonight. I was just wondering about my whole life i guess. As a child in kindergarten, i was popular. In primary school, i was...well liked i guess. In the first 2 years of SMKSJ, guess i was still in the limelight for a while. Yup, this is where i was in my first relationship. And these are the years where I wasn't a runner, a Leo president, a state group gymnast. I was neither. I was pretty much a simple girl just like any other inactive student there was. And yes i was well liked. I don't mean to brag, just keep reading and you'll get my point.

After that things changed a bit. I started to take part in runs and won. I got into MSSM gim and won. I gained my first post as Membership Director in form 3. It was this time where I realised no one can have all friends and no foe. To make matters worse, I started to get attracted to members of the opposite sex. haha as in head over heels kinda crushes. In the social field, I guess I was slowing down. But in the activity department however, things got more and more hectic. I got involved in more and more stuff. Olahraga, karate, performances, advertisement? ahahha...yup. Form 4 , July I got appointed as president of Leo. Once again, i added a few more foes to my list. The stress from PMR and SPM didn't help.

Now in college, still actively involved in Leo, it suddenly hit me. Back when I was a nobody, i enjoyed life more. People liked me for me. And i was happy. I don't know when I started to be someone so power crazy. I don't know when I started to want people to like me so much. But as of a couple of hours ago I think I was still that person. But right now, I suddenly see myself from a different perspective. I start to think if the people that currently call themselves my friends like me for me. And the people that respect me in Leo really do respect me. I wonder how many people have backstabbed me since i stepped into college. Well, my question for you readers tonight would be, and pls answer me as honestly as you can, have I changed since primary school or since secondary school(for those who knew me later)? For better or for worse? Am I doing the right thing by getting myslef so involved in things?

sexy naught b****y

went to Tmn SEA's and SMDJ's install. well, actually i was in Tmn SEA for less than an hour. and i paid 7 bucks for nothing, no food, no souvenir, nothing. the function hadn't even started and we had to leave for DJ. oh well, at least i met Lion Terence and Lion Ivan and they're very nice. makes me wonder if they're just as bad as Lion Chris. haha...coz all this PJ lions, i used to think it was such a luxury to have them as the leo advisors coz they seemed so committed, so involved, so concerned. Used to compare them to SJ lions and envy Leos like DJ, Assunta, TP. well, so much for envying.

SMDJ? 3 words...sexy, naughty, b****y. haha okla maybe they're not like that in person, but they sure dress like that. i should've brought my camera. Honolulu Hawaii. My my did the girls live up to the theme precisely. midriffs, micro skirts, shaking like nobody's business on stage. And u should've seen Lion Terence and Lion Chris whipping out their cameras!  I think if Lion Neoh was there he would've gone ballistic! ahahha and we wonder why the Assunta and TP always get Top and Outstanding awards. I have to hand it to them though, they're good at shaking. Their headmistress, PK and teacher advisor was right there with the Lions! talk about bold. oh well, at least i got my share of entertainment when they had the modelling show...there were topless guys!! hahah but most of them were showing their 36 bones. and fair...argh! guys, under any circumstance, should not be fair!! tanned, buffed, toned up...that's my definition of hunk! there was one guy though...cuteee...buffed! hahah but he's short. shorter than me. oh well, he's too young anyway. ;)

well, that was how my day went yesterday. wasn't too bad. had fun laughing at my members who seemed turned on by DJ's chics. i can't really rhyme these days. must be the workload, took up my my brain cells.

anyway, my kor can be really sweet. haha...i showed him the portrait of me and he replied with:

Now only I see the picture, wah... my baby sister really look like movie star.But she already got natural beauty lah, the make-over give little improvements, hehe.-Kevin