2010

Like last year, I'm gonna sum up the things I managed to do in 2010.

If I thought being 23 wasn't all that fun, being 24 was pretty awesome. It started out extremely amazing, had a couple of lows in between the months, but it generally stayed quite cool throughout the year.

In 2010...

I started to train people on a freelance basis. My first client was Kenneth.

I went to 2 waterfalls

I went camping again

I won a grand from one night marathon in Putrajaya

I stayed with a Hong Kong family, ate heaps of fu qua, spoke more than 10 sentences of Cantonese in a day, and learned how to make buns

I bought a new car, crashed it, profited from insurance claims, and bought another car.

I did the Tongariro Alpine Crossing wearing cheap as $20 boots which almost severed my ankles

I got myself a tattoo

I hiked up Mount Ruapehu and experienced a snow blizzard, albeit a mini one

I got soaked in the rain and mud at the International Rainforest Music Festival in Miri, Sarawak

I failed my first university subject

I did another sprint triathlon after a 2 year long hiatus

I did 3 weeks of Bootcamp

I got a new phone and is now a big fan of the wonderful world of smart phones

I played fireworks on Guy Fawkes Day

I lived with 2 French girls, a German guy and a Japanese guy

I cooked dinner for 13 relatives who visited me in Auckland

I ran another marathon personal best!

I traveled to another country by myself and couch surfed!

I traveled around the South Island of New Zealand with my family and loved it

I bungy jumped from 134m above the ground!

I obtained my first major injury i.e. plantar fasciitis

I became a Bootcamp physical instructor

I got my picture up on the wall in a gym in Auckland

I learn to let go

The end of 2010 was marred by the break up. A year ago, I was falling madly in love again with the same boy I had been in love with for the past 3 years. Today, I love him no less. I am still learning to let go. I guess time will heal the wounds, and with a new year, comes a new breath of life. Let's hope 2011 brings me the happiness I seek.

Happy new year, peeps!

Laugh.

I had a pretty good day today.

Went for karaoke with Julie, Weng and Pei Jien and it was epic. It was the most fun I've had in a while. =)

Then I went for lamb burger with Jon, Gene and Seu Foong and it was good fun too. Laughed loads. =) Doesn't matter that this was the 3rd burger I've had this week.

Laugh. Today I laughed. Whole heartedly. :)

Yay!

I ran a whole 5 km today and didn't get a funky heel.

YAY!

Picking up the pieces

The biggest obstacle I seem to face these days is picking up the pieces of my broken heart, as drama-queen as that may sound. I don't know if it is somewhat psychological, but I almost don't want to recover and move on. I feel as if I want to stay here in my rut, wallow in pity, and cling on to memories I held so dearly for the past few years.

But recently I sat down and spoke to probably the wisest people in my life, the ones who know me inside and out, and understand me even when I sometimes think they don't - mum and dad. It was a long, heavy, emotion-stricken conversation, and I sobbed like I did when I was 5. But I woke up the next day feeling a whole lot better, albeit with puffy eyes.

Ever since then, I've felt lighter. I feel like I can finally be happy for the ones who are happy around me. I feel less jealous of them, and a little more accepting of my current status. I've also begun exercising again, which is really great for the soul. I guess you could say I'm smiling again. Sincerely.

It's exactly 2 months ago since that phone call. I still do think of him every day, wondering what he's up to, where he is, and how he's getting along. I still reminisce happy times. But I guess I am slowly starting accept things. What was it? Don't feel sad that it's over, be glad that you've had it at all? Something like that.

Yeah, I'm glad I met the boy. He gave me some of the best times of my life, and I'll never forget them. But we'll let chips fall where they may. =)

Progress.

Today I threw my trainers on, and went running. The blubber around my waist was getting in the way, and I decided I couldn't stand it anymore.

I went slow and steady, feeling for any pangs of pain from my left heel. To my surprise, it behaved for a good 4 km or so. I was almost back in my neighbourhood when it started to feel slightly tight again. So I slowed to a brisk walk just to be cautious.

But that's progress! So I'm quite happy about it. I can finally shed this holiday look and start toning my body up again.

I'm gonna walk into 2011 with my chin up. =)

Merry Christmas, peeps =)

It's Christmas Day.

I just got home from a friend's place. Got home a little bit earlier because I wanted to sleep a little bit earlier for Bootcamp tomorrow.

But I guess the silence got the better of me again.

It's Christmas Day. I started to send a message to a few friends online and they were all either away, on Skype with a boyfriend/girlfriend or waiting for their boyfriend/girlfriend to come home.

It sucks. I know I know, I should stop emoing. But it sucks.

I guess at some point I will get used to the idea of spending these special holidays on my own. As in, I could spend it with friends, but when they all go home, or leave with their significant others, I'm back to being alone again.

I think I'm just being jealous. I am jealous of the people out there who have boyfriends and girlfriends and fiancés. It's as simple as that. I am saddened by the fact that I came home to misery and emptiness. Yes I have friends, yes I have my family. But there is a void that remains unfilled so long as I yearned to be with him.

I still feel a little cheated...a little ripped off. I was looking forward to summer. I was looking forward to being held, to holding hands, to cuddles, to kisses, to road trips, to dates, to text messages and to late night phone calls. I was looking forward to a reunion. I still haven't quite accepted the fact that all of that is gone.

Oh well. Merry Christmas anyway. Hope you all have a much brighter one than I did.