2008

2008 can be broken into 2 stages; before Auckland and after Auckland. Because i think the Karen in both stages are 2 completely different Karens...

Before Auckland was a whole slew of one oddjob after another. Having graduated fresh from Metropolitan College, armed with a business degree in hand and a new attained sense of purpose in life, I was actually pretty determined to find myself in the working world. I didn't have any plans whatsoever except to dip my feet in as many things possible in the 6 months that I had before i flew. January saw me racing up and down PWTC working for YouthMalaysia, at my wit's end trying to pull together a celebrity talk show and an Animax fashion show for Youth 08. And then, there was trying my hand at what was supposedly something I had dreamed of doing - personal training. Guess what? I stayed for 3 weeks and I couldn't have been unhappier. Didn't get to train anyone, felt like I was under pressure eventhough I had no specific job description at that point, and I missed out on a LOT of my social life because working hours were weird. I gave that up, wanted to kick back and relax for a couple of months, but i landed myself a 6 week job at Cosmotots. To be honest, teaching kids is still the job I am happiest with. I had some pretty good laughs during those classes and I miss those kids dearly. But teaching kids kinda stumps your mind a bit someitmes. Like there is no challenge, no room for going further, making bigger decisions, stuff like that...

Before Auckland, I had a thirst for ambition and I was so darned sure that I was on the right track to chasing my dreams. I was determined, full of passion and readiness to commit, and had great faith that I was going to start one of the best times of my life in just a couple of months, weeks, days...

And then I came to Auckland...

For those of you whom I've met up with over this past month, I think you can sense the melancholy that came in the tone of my voice when I spoke of Auckland. And perhaps I may have given off the idea that I'm not happy in Auckland.

To be honest, the first couple of months at least, that I was in Auckland were the gloomiest, loneliest days of my life. I had never felt so lonely, so homesick, so lovesick before. And Auckland, was very much NOT like the picture I painted for myself. Freedom and living alone abroad, wasn't either. There were sad days, and there were days that I coped better. And I guess some of you are rolling your eyeballs, and spitting out "I told you so"s. I think I had hoped for so much out of this that I when it was all not like that, I fell harder than I would've had I not had any expectations.

But I believe that I am building a life for myself there, slowly but surely. And I can assure you, that I have not regretted going there. When I set my foot down on doing this, I knew that life was not going to be a bed of roses and I knew that it was going to be hard living by all by myself. I just didn't think reality would hit me so soon (and so coldly too). But that being said, reality did and I went through some pretty lonesome moments, but that's just the beginning. It can only get better from here forth, I'm pretty sure.

As for Sport and Exercise Science, it is exactly the kind of course I should be doing. There is still that bitterness at the back of my throat as I wish again and again rhetorically, that I had done this first before anything else. But no regrets in the path that I have walked till now. What matters is the path that go on from here.

And I intend to make that an adventure race.=)

Have a great 2009 everyone!